home Consultations Thanatophobia: how to overcome the fear of death and live a full life? Fear of death - causes, symptoms, what to do

Thanatophobia: how to overcome the fear of death and live a full life? Fear of death - causes, symptoms, what to do

This is how the artist Julian Totino Tedesco depicted death.

The fear of death is a phobia that has the power to cross out the plot of life or distort its content. There are almost no people who are indifferent to death. Comprehension of one of the main existential questions about the meaning of life sooner or later forces one to think deeply about the “final”.

Anxiety, which inevitably arises in the process of such reasoning, is not yet a neurosis. And only when the thought of death becomes obsessive and persistent, they talk about thanatophobia - one of the most "popular" phobias. And if "natural" fear arises in response to a real/potential threat, obsessions do not need the presence of a source. A tanatophobe can be groundlessly panicky afraid of dying from cancer, the flu virus, becoming a victim of a plane crash. Thoughts about death can take on the most bizarre forms, taking over the mind.

The fear of death is a phobia that speaks to a person in the most ancient language - the language of instincts. Understanding the reasons for its appearance in the life of a particular person is half the battle. The answer to the problem "how to deal with the fear of death?" lies in the plane of the search for motives: what function does it (fear) perform in the life of this particular individual?

It is difficult to call the existence of a person involved in the whirlwind of death aversion comfortable and of high quality. But a phobia (like all others) is devoid of practical meaning. We will not become immortal by spending a significant part of our lives thinking about this issue. Wouldn't it be better to make it more meaningful, but how to do it?

About the causes of thanatophobia

Fear of death is a phobia with a complex etiology. It is often based on an "unfulfilled mission", when there is a need to change one's own life, taking into account everything that has not been fulfilled, not realized, not experienced and not felt.

Most philosophers and writers repeat in their writings the idea that only those who live their lives inefficiently are afraid of death. Leo Tolstoy, Nietzsche, Zorba the Greek, Jean-Paul Sartre spoke about this. But how to live it (life) effectively? A harmonious scenario involves the phased implementation of all plans and getting satisfaction from the process. In reality, it often happens otherwise - the program crashes. "Not my life" leads to the development of neurosis, in the thickness of which - fears, anxiety, complexes, depression.

You will be surprised, but thanatophobia often arises under the influence of indirect, at first glance, causes. It becomes a consequence of the impact of a dysfunctional external environment on a dysfunctional "internal".

"Information overload"

Television is the main hotbed of thanatophobia

The information flow that falls on a person who has set out to “put life in order” is striking in its scale. To understand one specific issue, you need to spend a huge amount of time studying the sources, analyzing the opinions of experts. There is no time for a full immersion in the problem. One has to either move forward, despite the lack of experience, knowledge, or stop in despair from the impossibility of taking another step. “Procrastination is like death” and thoughts about the worthlessness of being begin to visit more and more often.

"Everything is meaningless"

A neurotic disorder can be caused by the thought “it’s pointless to do something”, because you can have a little time (“and I’m already so many years old”), there are no necessary resources for a quality life (“how can one count on something with such an appearance”) and any other reason that emphasizes the lack of desire to build something in life.

"Promotion of Immortality"

In Christian culture, the peacock was a symbol of immortality.

Fear of death is a phobia that can develop under the influence of the media, where the fact of human mortality is presented under various sauces, including commercially profitable ones (laying the idea of immortality into the subconscious). By the way, the higher the frequency of articles in popular science newspapers about theories of immortality (“digitization” of personality and other options for eternal life), the more people are drawn into a panic called thanatophobia.

The popularization of films about the "immortals" is another confirmation of this. Can a movie about vampires become a reason for the development of neurosis? Why not, if you get carried away with the idea of eternal life.

"False prosperity"

Despite the increased safety of life and the creation of the maximum number of comfortable conditions for a person, fears disturb more often. With a low level of medicine, frequent mortality was perceived rather as the norm and did not cause strong emotions. Today the event is painted with extremely dramatic tones.

There is a category “safe, comfortable, painless” in the human mind, but the reality shows the other side - dangerous, uncomfortable and rather painful. Neurosis often occurs at the junction of two extremes. We are too accustomed to "well-being" and do not agree with the opposite. Death in the 21st century begins to cause shock and rejection.

"True wellbeing"

In a separate group, it is necessary to single out people whose fear of death is due not to a “false life”, but to a true one. The fear of losing everything beautiful at once (an ideal family, financial well-being, excellent health) deprives a person of joy. Accordingly, not only "obsolete human nature" gives rise to thanatophobia. The reason may lie in the area of a prosperous life, but is it possible in this case to assert satisfaction with it?

How to overcome the fear of death?

The fear of death is the basis of self-preservation and survival inherent in all living beings. In ancient times, savages, seeing the corpse of their fellow tribesman, experienced fear, which increased their vigilance - "the danger is near, you need to be careful." Today, it is the fear of death that forces us to look around and only then cross the road.

But thanatophobia is an obsessive mania that begins to rule the life of a particular individual. The catalyst (trigger) for its occurrence can be any dramatic event:

loss of a loved one;
fatal disease;
crisis "transitional" age (and retirement) - 30, 40, 50 years;
job loss, relocation or any other life shock.

It is obvious that the muzzle of a pistol pointed at close range is not the only reason that contributes to the emergence of an “awakening experience” (according to I. Yalom). You don't have to be on your deathbed to get in touch with the most problematic existential question. Another thing is how to relate to it, how to build death into the context of your life?

For example, one of the arguments of Epicurus recalls that the state after death is no different from the non-existence in which we already existed before our birth. They are exactly the same, so why are we so afraid of the second and completely indifferent to the first?

Support can be found not only in Epicurean views. For some, overcoming fear comes after understanding the idea that the main thing is to live for the sake of an act that will remain in the memory of other people or will bring some benefit to the world - "to last in the lives of others." Plant an apple orchard or build a sturdy bench in the yard. Write a book or become a posthumous donor.

We will talk about other ways to overcome it below, but first you need to understand that fear has a positive function. Refusing it, ignoring it, or deliberately belittling it is unwise.

On the positive side of the fear of death

As we remember, in ancient times, the fear of death warned him of danger, "armed" him with speed of response, anger, and strength. And today, after millennia, the fear of death does not arise out of the blue. Its presence captures the danger - direct or indirect.

The positive function of fear is to be on guard of life, to ensure the continuation of the family. We are afraid to walk along the edge of the abyss and, with rare exceptions, we will refrain from such a deadly act. From the point of view of common sense, pathology is rather the “absolute” absence of fear of death, but it is still necessary to distinguish between “natural” fear and phobia.

Psychotherapy, eliminating obsessive states, simultaneously solves a number of other tasks - it improves the quality of life of its patient, helps in the implementation of a positive (true) life scenario and the elimination of a false one. Thanatophobia is not removed by a psychotherapeutic scalpel, but is transformed into a creative principle.

Whether a child or an adult, every person comes into contact with death. Violation of its adequate perception, obsessive pictures of death, panic from the transience (instantaneity) of one's being are symptoms of thanatophobia. The advice to "love life" in relation to such people is premature. It is necessary to understand why a person stopped loving her and focused all his attention on an event that would cross her out.

By the way, thanatophobia may indicate the presence of other psychoneurotic disorders - vegetative-vascular dystonia, for example. Diagnosis is always the result of an examination that can reveal a number of cause-and-effect relationships. At home, you can try to unravel a simple conflict knot through steps such as:

focusing on the issue of self-realization: identifying unused aspects that can be implemented, searching for an answer to the question “how do I really want to live, who do I want to be?”;
changing your life, taking into account “potential regrets”: what needs to be done so that in a few years you will not regret what you did / did not do;
understanding that death only enhances the value of life, providing all the opportunities for its sensual, emotional and other enrichment: to fill every moment with action, deed, feeling;
awareness of the "ripple effect": your good deeds will become a continuation of your life;
consolation can be found in religious movements, but this is reminiscent of an attempt to get away from resolving the issue, the denial of death, its “demortality”, which is not an adequate attitude towards it.

How to deal with the fear of death in order to become a winner?

But is it necessary to overcome thanatophobia? Among the negative consequences of its development are the rupture of social contacts, loneliness, depreciation of the motives and meaning of any activity, constant stress affects health and can lead to a serious illness that “confirms” the validity of fears (programming a life scenario).

Imagine that a person is so afraid of dying suddenly for some reason that he tries to avoid crowded places, drive a car, fly an airplane, go to the forest, etc. A terrible fear of death poisons the whole existence, causes great despair and fear of life to such an extent that he tries to leave the house less and closes himself with seven locks. This is no longer just a natural fear, but a pathological state of the psyche, which is called thanatophobia. What are the main causes of this phobia? How does an obsessive state manifest itself, how to get rid of the fear of death?

Why is thanatophobia dangerous?

It is believed that the fear of death, hidden deep in the subconscious, is at the heart of almost all phobias. If the obsessive, uncontrollable fear of dying comes to the fore, this is a manifestation of thanatophobia. The fear of sudden death, if timely treatment is not started, can lead to very serious consequences. A person ceases to see the meaning of his existence, he constantly has thoughts in his head that sooner or later he will die anyway. This affects his professional and daily activities, the motivation to do something and the ability to rejoice disappear. The fear of death can develop into a fear of life, the patient closes himself in loneliness, loses social ties and close relationships, because at every corner he sees danger, a threat to his health. This is especially true for middle-aged and elderly people. Under the influence of constant anxiety and stress, disturbances in the functioning of body systems appear, physiological symptoms, VVD syndrome, and panic attacks appear. The predominance of negative emotions causes disruptions in the nervous system, which can lead to irreversible changes in the cerebral cortex and the formation of psychosomatic pathologies. A person who is terribly afraid of dying may try to drown out the fear of becoming addicted to alcohol or drugs. Seeing no point in living in anticipation of imminent death, not knowing how to deal with the fear of death, a person may attempt suicide. It is also worth noting that prolonged depression can be caused.

The main causes of a phobia

Why do some people develop a panic fear of death? The exact causes have not been fully established, although the main theories of the occurrence of fear of death are associated with the influence of society and heredity. Many scientists name other reasons for the development of this phobia:

Personal experience associated with the death of someone close to you. The tragedy and despair caused by the loss of a loved one provokes an inexplicable way of disagreeing with death - irrational fear. Fear of death in children, especially preschool age, most often appears just for this reason.
Showing and describing negative events related to death through the media. Stories about accidents, murders, catastrophes in some people cause constant painful thoughts about their own death.
Fear of the unknown or the desire to control everything can provoke a fear of death. A person is afraid of what will happen after death, because no one knows for sure. He is afraid of what he has no control over, sometimes he is simply afraid of dying in his sleep.
Thanatophobia can be the result of religious beliefs. The fear of sinning, of being subjected to divine judgment, of being punished for one's unrighteous deeds causes the fear of sudden death.
The crisis age from 35 to 50 years, when a person has painful experiences due to a reassessment of priorities, goals, as well as despair due to unfulfilled hopes, all this can provoke the development of a phobia.
A woman carrying a child may be very afraid of death before childbirth, especially if the pregnancy proceeds with complications or the woman has to raise the child alone. Tanatophobia before childbirth is caused by fear for the unborn baby, the mother is worried about what the child will do if she is gone.

In the elderly, in the presence of typical diseases of the elderly, fears associated with the expectation of death very often increase.

Features of the manifestation of the disease

Often, thanatophobia manifests itself not as a fear of death as such, but as a fear of excruciating pain from a fatal illness or a fear of becoming incapacitated, living inferiorly. For some people, the fear of death is associated with concern for their elderly parents, a small child, for whom the person is responsible. Especially single parents can panic fear for the life of the child after their death. As a rule, a person suffering from thanatophobia in his thoughts imagines his end in specific circumstances, and subsequently tries to avoid these circumstances. If he is afraid of dying from a serious illness, then he will endlessly visit doctors, do all kinds of tests, tests and examinations. He develops an obsessive style of behavior. Typical symptoms of the disease:

sleep disorder (nightmares, vegetative seizures may occur in a dream), decreased libido, loss of appetite;
unexplained neurotic pain, VVD attacks, panic attacks, anxiety syndrome;
constant anxiety, aggression, nervousness, increased irritability;
gloomy mood, anxiety, feeling of despair;
self-doubt, suspiciousness;
increased excitability, impressionability, sensitivity to criticism.

The risk group includes the elderly, preschool children, women before childbirth. Why these particular categories? Elderly people often have various diseases. Therefore, the cause of phobic attacks may be related to the fear of becoming helpless due to some illness, and such people are often afraid to die in terrible agony due to illness or simply die in their sleep. In women before childbirth, all fears seem natural. Of course, every expectant mother worries about the baby. But there are situations when, before giving birth, a woman is so afraid of dying and leaving her baby alone that panic attacks, VVD and other very unpleasant symptoms of tantophobia roll over her. Before childbirth, all these manifestations pose a real danger to the health of the child. Therefore, if the fears are very strong, it is better to consult a psychologist before giving birth on how to get rid of the fear of death. Why are preschool children at risk? The fact is that it is during this period that the child begins to understand what death is. In preschool children, the intellect is already sufficiently developed to realize that the grandmother no longer comes to visit because she is no longer alive. The understanding that everything in nature has its end can cause fear in preschool children of the death of their parents. What to do about it, especially if the baby has panic attacks? How to overcome the fear of death in a child, a child psychologist or child psychotherapist will tell you.

The main ways of treatment

There is no single strategy for how to overcome the fear of death. For each individual patient, thanatophobia has its own causes, manifestations, characteristic symptoms, and the form of the course of the phobia. Therefore, in order to learn how to overcome the fear of death, it is necessary to contact a specialist. Only a qualified psychotherapist or psychiatrist can diagnose thanatophobia during a consultation. Often there are situations when the elderly, women before childbirth, and indeed any people are diagnosed with VVD, taking into account only somatic symptoms and vegetative seizures. A person can treat VVD for a long time, take unnecessary drugs, but the subconscious feeling of fear remains, provoking new panic attacks, anxiety syndrome and VVD attacks. Treatment will be successful only if psychological work is carried out with the patient with the fear of death. The doctor, if necessary, may prescribe certain drugs to relieve acute symptoms of VVD and treat anxiety. In some cases, it is enough to conduct several psycho-correction sessions if the phobia is not very strong. Treatments such as cognitive behavioral therapy and hypnosis have worked well. If the fear of death is combined with another mental disorder, for example, depression, anxiety, then it is necessary to determine which of the disorders is primary, and then prescribe the appropriate treatment. If a person has a feeling of despair associated with the possible impact of his death on loved ones (elderly parents, spouse, child), then group meetings with a psychologist will help get rid of the phobia. Each patient is assigned an individual treatment based on the form, intensity of VVD attacks and anxiety syndrome, the severity of his phobia, as well as his personality characteristics. Living with a pathological fear of death is always difficult and fraught with undesirable consequences, so timely treatment plays a big role for every person.

What will help get rid of the fear of death?

Fear of death is a natural defense mechanism that protects a person from dangerous behavior, but too much panic fear of dying provokes fear of life. Most of the owners of this phobia do not know how to cope with the fear of death, overcome panic attacks, VVD attacks, anxiety syndrome and other troubles that accompany the phobic syndrome. This poisons communication with people, causes great despair, negatively affects relatives and friends, and prevents you from living a full life. Dealing with the fear of death should always begin with professional advice. For the treatment of a phobia to be effective, psychologists advise not to distance yourself from death, this will only aggravate the symptoms of anxiety and fear. To get rid of the obsessive state, it is necessary to realize and accept the life cycle that begins with birth and ends with death. Understanding the inevitability of the natural course of life and the fact that everything in nature has its beginning and end will help a person to live so that before death he can look back at his life without regret. Experts advise to live in the moment, try to live every day for your own pleasure, without thinking about the future. For a person who wants to get rid of the fear of death, support from relatives is very important. The absence of fear of death and awareness of the value of every moment of one's existence helps to live a full, interesting life.

The article considers the fear of death as one of the phobias with specific features and characteristics. The causes of fear of death, manifestations at different ages, the possibility of correction and treatment are characterized.

Thanatophobia, fear of death or phobia (fear, fear) of death - this synonymous series reflects a phenomenon associated with a person’s attitude to the finiteness of life: to death and dying, fear of this possibility and the real state.

The experience of anxious feelings about the discontinuity of life is the norm for a healthy person. If such fear does not affect the ordinary course of life, then it is justified and natural.

In a situation where this fear turns into an uncontrollable state, when it is impossible to get rid of and overcome it, we are talking about the fear of death, which manifests itself as a phobia.

Thanatophobia manifests itself through a string of symptoms:

awareness of the inevitability of death results in a feeling of despair;
constant fear and incessant anxious thoughts in the absence of a real threat to life;
fixation on a specific and fictional scenario of dying - death in a plane crash, from an incurable disease in agony, which is accompanied by the avoidance of conditions conducive to the scenario (people do not travel by air, avoid doctors and hospitals);
somatic manifestations: loss of normal sleep, appetite and weight loss; decrease or lack of sexual activity; painful sensations of a neurotic nature;
manifestations of accentuated character traits (increased suspiciousness or impressionability, anxiety, self-doubt and excitability);
obsession with overvalued ideas created by the person himself and energy (perseverance, aggression) in the process of their implementation and implementation;
the number of social contacts is reduced (including relatives and friends);
vital and professional affairs are relegated to the background;
constant stress contributes to the negatives in the physiology of the body (malfunctions in the functioning of organs and systems; shudders are characteristic when falling asleep);
prolonged emotional stress leads to drug addiction, alcoholism, and other addictions.

Forms

What is the fear of death in humans? There are several forms and manifestations:

fear of pain suffering and loss of dignity. It manifests itself through the fear of the circumstances of death, and not the death itself. It seems that before death a person will suffer and suffer, lose dignity. The accompanying form is the fear of getting sick (nosophobia).
Fear of the unknown and uncertainty. Not a single person will say exactly what death is - no one has ever returned after it. The individual is not able to comprehend the nature of death, is lost in his own expectations.
Fear of eternal punishment and non-existence. Belief in painful punishments after death is inherent not only to religious people. Fears are actualized due to the expectation of punishment for bad deeds. Also, anxiety arises about the absurdity and injustice of human mortality - the individual simply ceases to exist.
Anxiety about losing control. Death is uncontrollable, it is impossible to influence it - this frightens many. Even following the strict rules of a rational (healthy) lifestyle does not give a person a sense of control, but leads to even greater feelings.
Fear of irreparable losses and mental anguish. It can manifest itself in women before childbirth, as the fear of losing a child. Or as the loss of loved ones and relatives of any individual. It feels like the world has stopped, everything is falling apart.
Fear of being alone at death. The expectation of complete loneliness at the time of dying - everyone goes through death individually.
Fear of long dying that this process will drag on for a long time, will be gradual over many hours, days or even months.

Reasons for the fear of death

It is difficult to clearly name the specific cause of the fear of death. There are always several versions: starting with hereditary predisposition, conditions for the formation of personality, ending with the influence of society and social reality.

Generalized causes of thanatophobia can be:

Features of the formation of personal life experience. An individual is formed in various circumstances, including those associated with a sudden loss (death of friends and relatives) as a result of catastrophic events. Tragedies and misfortunes make us pay special attention to death.
Abrupt changes in individual life events. Loss of health, financial situation, work and opportunities can become a provoking factor.
Violations in the spiritual development of the individual. Development in general develops according to the scenario of progress and positive, or as degradation and negative. In the second case, philosophical approaches to solving existential problems (questions of existence) lead to conclusions about threatening non-existence, thoughts about the meaninglessness of everything that exists, and give rise to suicidal thoughts.
Life (age) crises. Here there is a reassessment of personal priorities and approaches to existence. Everything that is connected with the debunking of plans and hopes, goals and principles of self-realization is a problem. There are painful experiences.
Consequences of Religious Beliefs. It manifests itself in the fear of making a mistake and doing something inappropriate, not according to the canons.
Feeling dissatisfied with life. The brighter its manifestation, the more powerful thanatophobia manifests itself.
Pathological fear of everything new. This personality trait forces a person to keep himself within the usual framework at any cost. The possibility of death does not fit into this framework, which leads to a distorted and irrational perception of it, disturbing behavior.

Psychiatrists also refer manifestations of a person's subconscious to common causes of fear of death.:

unusually vivid and powerful dreams;
subconscious signals in the form of an inner voice and intuitive guesses (insights).

Age features

The perception and understanding of the phenomenon of death changes with age. Each period of a person's life - childhood, youth, adulthood, maturity - has its own characteristics of the fear of death.

In a child/adolescent

In childhood, the child determines the existence of death indirectly:

by the disappearance of a grandparent, a beloved pet, falling leaves and approaching insects;
reactions to the grief of parents, gravestones - a copy of the reaction of adults: silent restraint and grief; if fear is manifested by a child, parents try in every possible way to distract him from it.

Perceiving the fact of death, children begin to feel fear for it consciously only under the influence of the reaction of an adult. A misunderstanding of death creates a psychologically difficult situation for children, which can also lead to fear of death.

Adolescence is characterized by the stage of personality formation. The understanding of death is specific: the process of dying causes increased anxiety, thoughts of suicide may even arise due to conscious hopelessness.

To overcome fear, compensatory behavior is born:

a teenager is looking for "salvation" in hard games on the computer (there is a feeling of dominating events);
manifests itself through impudent and unceremonious behavior;
takes activating substances, although after alcohol, nicotine or drugs, the fear becomes stronger.

In adults

Teenage anxieties and fear of death in a maturing person are replaced by basic life attitudes: career and family. The phobia of death manifests itself with renewed vigor during the midlife crisis (after 30-35). There is a feeling of the beginning of a life sunset, a reassessment of achievements and a place in life is made.

Anxious thoughts of a person about death remain with him forever. Neurosis, as a result of the intensification of the crisis and getting bogged down in it, develops a fear of dying in even more negative.

In the elderly

Old age and the fear of death coexist side by side - in the "everyday" mode. In old age, it is a consequence of reflection and acceptance of the inevitable.

Fear intensifies in the case of a severe and protracted illness: it is not the death itself that frightens, but its duration, loss of reason and humiliation of dignity. There are also reactions of apathy and hopelessness, even a desire to hasten the end of one's own life, so as not to suffer.

When Fear Turns into Phobia

Phobia is the state of fear when it goes beyond the norm.Pathological manifestations of the fear of death have a number of signs:

obsessive fear, permeates all actions: decision-making or their delay, becomes the cause of inexplicable actions and reactions;
a total apathy(“There is no point in doing something, anyway, the result of everything is death”);
alternation of apathy and overactivity, excessive fussiness (“you have to do everything, suddenly death is already tomorrow!”);
fear of events and objects associated with death (cemeteries, funerals, tombstones, wreaths, stories about death).

Is the absence of fear a pathology?

A healthy fear of death - as an instinct for self-preservation, an indicator of a well-formed personality that understands the biological and psychological nature of a person - is quite natural.

If an individual's fear of death is completely repressed from consciousness, this is a sign of the absence of a norm. Such people appear in the following ways:

they do not have or manifest at an insignificant level the mechanism of empathy;
there is no satisfaction when communicating with another person (rejection of people in general);
there is no or reduced sense of physical danger;
reduced threshold for pain perception;
lowered the fear of death in brightly criminal personalities.

In itself, the absence of fear of death is not the cause of destructive manifestations; rather, it accompanies emotional disturbances in mental pathologies.

Reflection and an analytical approach are mental phenomena that will help overcome the painful perception of death. To a large extent, this is facilitated by cognitive-behavioral and humanitarian psychotherapy, as a result of the interaction between the psychologist and the client in the course of working through the anxious and negative manifestations of the fear of death.

How to overcome the fear of death to get rid of unhealthy fears? A few tips:

Awareness of cyclicity. The existence of a person is a natural chain that begins at birth, continues through life, and ends with the process of death. This is neither good nor bad - just a fact. All people go through this chain.
The memory remains in the minds and hearts. Memories of loved ones and relatives about the individual are preserved. The more people feel the positive attention, the good deeds of a person, the more constructive actions he does during his life, the stronger and more durable these memories will be. We must hurry to do as much as possible!
The importance of sharing with others. Closure in oneself leads to the cyclicity of disturbing thoughts, to movement in a vicious circle.
enjoy life while it is possible. Worrying about the finiteness of life and the inevitability of death can take too much time, prevent you from showing yourself as a person. Hobbies, new activities and experiences, reading books, work and other things should distract yourself from hopelessness.
No need to worry ahead of time. With obsessive thoughts about death, a person only brings the end closer and will not be able to feel, appreciate any joys of life. This should be remembered.
Optimism is the backbone. A cheerful attitude and positive thinking help to get rid of many diseases, including the obsessive phobia of death.
materialism or faith? Relying on them gives a clear position and reassures: either a person understands the biological nature of the living and takes it for granted, or faith gives support and hope for the existence of a person outside the body.
Humor. You can just read jokes or funny stories about death.

No matter how varied the advice of specialists is, the main thing is the desire and motives of the person himself in an effort to reduce the significance of the fear of death.

Video: Fear of death

The fear of death haunts people for many centuries. The Sumerian king Gilgamesh was looking for the flower of life, the legendary Alexander the Great tried to discover a stream of living water, and medieval alchemists spent years creating the philosopher's stone. Modern humanity continues these searches, but acts according to existing realities and seeks salvation in medicine. While the elixir of immortality has not yet been discovered, many people live with a constant fear of death. How to get rid of it?

Why is there a fear of death

Each person has their own idea of death. But in general, the following factors influence the occurrence of fear of death:

attachment. A person does not want to part with loved ones, favorite work, material wealth;
fear of the unknown. The fear of stepping over the line beyond which the unknown lies is inherent in many people. To a lesser extent, it is expressed when moving to a new job, getting married, moving to another country. But since death is forever, the fear is much stronger;
unwillingness to experience physical pain. If all people died peacefully in their sleep, then the fear of death would have much fewer “fans”. Many fear that the process of dying will be accompanied by severe pain caused by injury or disease;
fear of one's own weakness. People who are used to commanding and controlling everything feel terrible when they cannot go to the toilet on their own or get up for a glass of water. No one wants to be a burden to relatives while on their deathbed. But even worse for those who realize that there will be no one to take care of them.

Buried alive

There is a very interesting practice that allows you to get to know yourself better and get rid of fears. A hole is dug in which a person is placed. He has a special mask on his face that allows air to enter. The hole is covered with earth. So that the “buried” person does not suddenly say goodbye to mental health, the instructor rhythmically hits the tambourine: this sound is well heard underground. The average time for which a person is buried is from 2 minutes to 2 hours: who can withstand how much. Some extreme people go underground and for a much longer period: up to 24 hours. They say that the first 60 seconds are the most difficult, then the mind calms down.

During such a psychological exercise, a person is not distracted by anything, and he can think through his fear. Those who have risen from the "grave" look at life in a new way and cease to be afraid of death.

I am what I dream

Buddhists believe that sleep is a small death. And having died, a person behaves in the same way as during sleep. Whoever does not remember anything, waking up, will not understand anything even after death, but will simply unconsciously be reborn in a new body. No matter what attitude a person who is afraid to die has towards Buddhist beliefs, the practice of lucid dreaming helps to see that a person is not only a physical body.

There are many books out there that describe techniques and exercises for gaining control of dreams. And some people have this skill since childhood.

Some "realized" are so addicted to the world of dreams that they spend all their free time there. But on the other hand, few have heard of the fear of death among this category of the population.

Death is a lonely affair

It should be accepted that each person lives and dies on his own. Colleagues, spouses, relatives, classmates, friends - all these are groups of people, for the most part formed by chance. Any representative of the "cell" lives, guided only by their desires and needs.

When the understanding comes that “I am at my own place”, there is no cooling of feelings or rejection of people close to me before. There is just a realization that it is not scary to leave your loved ones: everyone has their own purpose of existence on earth and their own methods of achieving it.

I am friends with myself

Death is the culmination of life. At this moment, it will no longer be possible to hone yourself with a noisy crowd, drowning out the inner voice. In order not to meet your own demons at the last moment of your life, you need to come to terms with yourself during your lifetime. This can be achieved in various ways, for example, using:

meditation;
keeping a diary;
visits to a psychologist;
creative activities;
long stay alone without means of communication.

When a person is not afraid to look inside himself, he is not so afraid to step beyond the brink of death.

What is natural is...

Nothing is eternal. Sooner or later, stars and planets, civilizations, plants, and animals complete their life cycle. Passes pain and joy, happiness and sorrow. Finiteness is the main principle of life. And people, having just come into the world, are already stepping on the path leading to dying. You just have to come to terms with this fact.

There is nothing wrong with facing death. Why fear the inevitable? If there is nothing after death, then the person will not know about it. After all, he does not worry because he was in non-existence before his birth.

And if you believe that there is a certain cosmic law and the soul is eternal, then even better. After death, the journey will only continue and new horizons of knowledge will open.
Where Dreams Lead

The protagonist of the aforementioned film, after his death, ended up in a place created by the dreams of his wife who remained on earth. Why not borrow this idea? Eastern religions claim that a person ends up in the place that he thought about at the time of death.

You can think over the most suitable "environment" of the afterlife for yourself. Christian paradise with trumpeting angels or just a beautiful meadow with lush flowers? If there is inspiration, then this world should be described on paper or painted. Really everything you can imagine. And when there is a place to which the soul aspires, it is not scary to die, because the unknown disappears.

The whole world is theater...

Life is beautiful because you can try everything in it. It resembles a game: someone prefers the role of a serious accountant, and someone - an eternally unemployed musician. Life is given in order to embody the most daring dreams in it. But sooner or later the curtain falls, and a person has to say goodbye to the "grateful audience" in the form of his relatives and friends.

Death crosses out all the misdeeds and mistakes committed by a person. How would humanity live if no one died naturally? Parents would forever grieve for the children who died in accidents, and the murderers would be endlessly punished with guilt for their deeds. But death equalizes everything. The role is played, badly or well, but the performance is over.

If you accept life as a game that will end sooner or later, then it will not be scary to break away and move to another country, leave an unloved wife or change a boring job. People who have reached such an understanding are not afraid of death, but perceive it as one of the stages of their existence.

Dr. Aibolit

Sometimes the fear of death is so strong that coexistence with it is impossible. You should contact a psychologist or psychotherapist in such cases:

if you are afraid to leave the house even in the daytime;
if suicidal thoughts appear in order to independently decide how and when to die;
if there is a desire to completely control the life of loved ones in order to protect them from death.

The help of a specialist is needed when fear develops into a phobia and interferes with normal life.

Everyone knows the legend of Ahasuerus, whom Jesus punished with eternal life. Perhaps a person is not afraid of what he should be?

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Many people experience a fear of death - a phobia. And this is not surprising, this is a normal human reaction. Some are afraid of the very thought that a person will be dead and what will happen to him, others are very afraid of the process of dying. But there is a category of people who experience a phobia all the time. They are haunted by the constant thought of it. Very often, it is associated with diseases of the central nervous system.

Death is a process that mankind, with all its achievements and scientific progress, cannot prevent. This understanding induces fear at first, and then it can develop into a phobia.

Strong fear of death - fear of losing control

A person is used to being in control of any situation. Some, of course, experience temporary difficulties and failures, but at the same time, control over the situation and self-control are present. The human brain is calm when the processes are automatic, there are no new life challenges and stressful situations. Everything is calm and going on as usual. But when we find ourselves in an unfamiliar environment, when things happen that we have never met, the brain sends alarm signals and panic occurs. The situation at the mere thought of death unbalances the subconscious, anxiety, fear-phobia begins, which leads a person to realize that I am very afraid of death.

Cause of fear - fear of pain

Many who claim "I'm afraid of dying" are not actually phobic about the process of dying, but about the perceived pain they might experience in doing so. Perhaps this happens on a subconscious level, when a person personally saw the death throes of the sick or wounded. For this reason, there was an association of death with the strongest painful torments. Such people need to try to get rid of such associations and stop thinking about the pain of death, which supposedly will certainly arise before death.

Unknown horror or horror of the unknown

There is a category of people who cannot get rid of the fear of the unknown. There are, in fact, a lot of those. Look around, can all people easily take and quit their jobs, without regret, knowing that there will be a new job tomorrow? We assume not. And what happens when a person is laid off from work or for some other reason is fired? He always finds a new job and very often the new position turns out to be better than the previous one. And how often do people you know get together and move to another city, because wages are many times higher? I also think not. These examples illustrate that many have a phobia not of death, but of the unknown. This phobia is based on a natural desire to know and understand everything, and a new place nullifies all knowledge. The subconscious mind is so programmed that it cannot get rid of the fear of the unknown and the person begins to think: "I'm afraid to die."

Fear of losing a loved one

A common phenomenon is the fear of losing a loved one forever. Mom, dad, beloved uncle, grandmother - it doesn't matter. The amazing thing is that people who care about other people have no fear for their lives at all. They are not afraid to die themselves, but the very thought of losing their beloved relatives causes tremendous emotional distress, which is sometimes impossible to get rid of. The alleged cause of this phobia is childhood psychological trauma, the cause of which, perhaps, lies in very long separations, accompanied by difficult experiences. Another possible reason, on the contrary, may be an overabundance of attention and, as a result, the fear of losing it. Many loving parents need to take note of this and stop paying extra attention to their beloved kids. It's not about the lack of attention from parents, it's about excessive attention, which is just as negative for the child as its absence.

How to prevent the problem

“I’m afraid of death,” an absolutely sane person can say. This is a completely normal instinct for self-preservation. As a rule, those who say the opposite are either cunning or have certain mental disorders that need to be dealt with. But constant fear for one's life is already a phobia, a mental disorder that a professional psychiatrist must diagnose and identify.

Phobia Symptoms

This problem is usually accompanied by the following symptoms:

Man constantly talks and thinks about death. This is normal for certain professions associated with it. For example, resuscitators, pathologists, mortuary orderlies, military personnel who participated in regional conflicts or anti-terrorist operations. But when people who are not connected with death constantly talk about this, then this is a certain signal for a possible mental deviation.
Excessive emotionality at the sight of things of a lethal theme, from which it is impossible to get rid of. For example, at the sight of a funeral, even on TV, hands begin to shake, and an emotional breakdown occurs in the form of hysteria, a person begins to make unnatural movements and does not find a place for himself. People begin to cry, even feel sorry for the heroes of the movie, knowing that everything is not real and the actor is actually alive.
The phobia progresses so strongly that a person does not easily experience fear, which he cannot get rid of, but also begins to wait for death. He actively plans it, thinks that it is about to come and you need to try to outwit it, to make sure that it does not come. One illustrative example took place in the United States during the height of the Cold War. Some were so afraid of death from a nuclear strike that they began to create underground bunkers for themselves. But some went even further - they voluntarily closed themselves in them, sincerely believing that the apocalypse would come, and sat in them for several years and even decades.

A very important task is to get rid of the phobia

To stop feeling fear, you need to try to implement a few rules:

The first is to realize the true causes of experiences. As psychologists say, getting rid of a problem begins with awareness. It is necessary to understand what exactly disturbs the subconscious, the fear of which interferes with life. And in most cases comes the realization that fears are unfounded.
The second is to control the situation. It is psychologically important to stop winding thoughts about imminent death in your head. It is important to think that life is under control, plan your actions, lifestyle, set life goals and achieve them. Then the realization will come that a person is the master of his life and he is not afraid of trials.
The third is support. It is important to find someone who will support, perhaps protect, suggest. Perhaps the problem is the absence of a family, the second half, children. It is important to change lives and start a family for which important goals will be achieved and a person will no longer utter the phrase: “I am very afraid to die.” For young children, this support may be a father or older brother, a teacher or a distant relative. Many in the role of a mentor find psychics, fortune-tellers, psychologists.
The fourth is charity. One of the effective means to overcome the fear of death is to fight against it and help people with cancer or other fatal ailments.
Fifth, medicines. All kinds of sedatives that relieve tension, stress, fatigue can be very effective in overcoming fears and worries.

Avoiding the problem is the wrong way to get rid of

Thus, you can find a way out of any difficult situation. But one thing is not recommended to do when a strong fear of death arises - to get away from the problem, to hide. The "ostrich method" will not get rid of the problem, but will only dull it for an indefinite time.

These troubleshooting steps include:

Leaving for totalitarian religious sects that promise to relieve pain, save the soul, prepare for the afterlife.
Give up and stop enjoying life. Seek solace in taking drugs, excessive drinking.
Get on the criminal path.

Thus, experiencing a strong fear of death - a phobia, you should not despair and you need to find the strength to get rid of it, ask for help from psychologists, psychiatrists, and public organizations.