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We intuitively and subconsciously understand how to behave in joyful, easy life situations and festive events. But there are events of a tragic nature - the death of a loved one, for example. Many are lost, faced with their unpreparedness for loss; for most, such events are beyond acceptance and awareness.

People experiencing loss are easily vulnerable, acutely aware of insincerity and pretense, their feelings are overwhelmed with pain, they need help to relieve it, accept it, come to terms with it, but in no case add to the pain with an accidentally thrown tactless word or incorrect phrase.

You need to be able to show increased tact and correctness, sensitivity and condescension. It is better to remain silent, showing delicate understanding, than to cause additional pain, hurt disturbed feelings, or touch nerves overloaded with emotions.

We will try to help you understand how to behave in a situation where the person next to you has suffered grief - the loss of a loved one, how to properly sympathize and choose the right words so that the person feels your support and sincere sympathy.

It is necessary to take into account the existing differences in condolences.

The form of expressing condolences for the loss will vary:

• Grandparents, relatives;
• mother or father;
• brother or sister;
• son or daughter - child;
• husband or wife;
• boyfriend or girlfriend;
• colleagues, employee.

Because the depth of experience varies.

Also, the expression of condolences depends on the severity of the grieving person’s feelings about what happened:

• Imminent death due to old age;
• imminent death due to serious illness;
• premature, sudden death;
• tragic death, accident.

But there is a main, general condition, independent of the cause of death - genuine sincerity in the expression of your grief.

The condolence itself should be short in form, but deep in content. Therefore, you need to find the most sincere words that accurately convey the depth of your sympathy and your willingness to provide support.

In this article we will provide samples and examples of various forms of expressing condolences and help you choose mournful words.

You will need:

Form and method of presentation

Condolences will have distinctive features in form and method of presentation, depending on their purpose.

Purpose:

1. Personal individual condolences to family and friends.
2. Official individual or collective.
3. Obituary in the newspaper.
4. Farewell mourning words at the funeral.
5. Funeral words at the wake: for 9 days, on the anniversary.

Serving method:

The timeliness factor is important, so the postal delivery method should only be used to send a telegram. Of course, the fastest way to offer your condolences is to use modern communication tools: email, Skype, Viber..., but they are suitable for confident Internet users, and these should be not only senders, but also recipients.

Using SMS to show sympathy and empathy is only acceptable if there are no other opportunities for contact with a person, or if the status of your relationship is distant acquaintance or formal friendly relations. Use this link to get it for different occasions.

Submission form:

In writing:

• Telegram;
• email;
• e-card;
• obituary - a mourning note in a newspaper.

In oral form:

• In a telephone conversation;
• in person.

In prose: Suitable for written and oral expression of grief.
In verse: Suitable for written expressions of grief.

Important points

All verbal condolences should be short in form.

• It is more delicate to express official condolences in writing. For this, a heartfelt verse is more suitable, to which you can choose a photo of the deceased, corresponding electronic pictures and postcards.
• Personal individual condolences must be exclusive and can be expressed either verbally or in writing.
• For the dearest and closest people, it is important to express or write sorrowful condolences in your own sincere words, not formal, which means not stereotyped.
• Since poems are rarely exclusive, exclusively yours, so listen to your heart, and it will tell you words of consolation and support.
• Not only words of condolences should be sincere, but also an offer of any help that is within your power: financial, organizational.

Be sure to mention the distinctive personal virtues and character traits of the deceased person that you would like to preserve in memory forever as an example: wisdom, kindness, responsiveness, optimism, love of life, hard work, honesty...

This will be the individual part of the condolence, the main part of which can be formulated according to the approximate model proposed in our article.

Universal mournful texts

1. “May the earth rest in peace” is a traditional ritual phrase that is said after a burial has taken place; it can be used as a condolence at a funeral service; it is suitable even for atheists.
2. “We all mourn your irreparable loss.”
3. “The pain of loss cannot be expressed in words.”
4. “I sincerely condole and sympathize with your grief.”
5. “Please accept my deepest condolences on the death of a dear person.”
6. “We will keep in our hearts the bright memory of the deceased wonderful man.”

Help can be offered in the following words:

• “We are ready to share the severity of your grief, be by your side and provide the necessary assistance to you and your family.”
• “Surely, you will need to resolve many issues. You can count on us, accept our help."

On the death of mother, grandmother

1. “The death of the closest person - mother - is an irreparable grief.”
2. “The bright memory of her will forever be in our hearts.”
3. “How much we didn’t have time to tell her during her lifetime!”
4. “We sincerely mourn and sympathize with you in this bitter moment.”
5. “Hold on! In memory of her. She wouldn't want to see you in despair."

On the death of a husband, father, grandfather

• “I offer my sincere condolences and express my deep sympathy in connection with the death of a loved one who was a reliable support for you and your family.”
• “In memory of this strong man, you must show fortitude and wisdom to survive this grief and continue what he did not finish.”
• “We will carry the bright and kind memory of him throughout our lives.”

On the death of a sister, brother, friend, loved one

1. “It is painful to realize the loss of a loved one, but it is even more difficult to come to terms with the departure of young people who have not known life. Everlasting memory!"
2. “Allow me to express my most sincere condolences on the occasion of this severe, irreparable loss!”
3. “Now you will have to become a support for your parents! Remember this and hang in there!”
4. “God help you survive and endure the pain of this loss!”
5. “For the sake of your children, their peace and well-being, you need to cope with this grief, find the strength to live and learn to look into the future.”
6. “Death does not take away love, your love is immortal!”
7. “Happy memory to a wonderful man!”
8. “He will forever remain in our hearts!”

If you are at a distance, find out via SMS. Select the appropriate message and send to the recipient.

On the death of a colleague

• “We've worked side by side for the last few years. He was an excellent colleague and example for young colleagues. His professionalism served as an example for many. You will forever remain in our memory as an example of life wisdom and honesty. May you rest in peace!”
• “Her/his dedication to her/his work earned her/him the respect and love of all who knew her/him. He/She will forever remain in my memory."
• “You were a wonderful employee and friend. How we will miss you. May you rest in peace!”
• “I can’t come to terms with the thought that you’re gone. It seems like just recently we were drinking coffee, discussing work and laughing... I will really miss you, your advice and crazy ideas.”

To the death of a believer

The text of condolences may contain the same mournful words as for a secular person, but an Orthodox Christian should add:

• Ritual phrase:

“The Kingdom of Heaven and Eternal Peace!”
"God is merciful!"

My dear, I really sympathize with your grief. My condolences... Be strong!
- Friend, I mourn your loss. I know this is a hard blow for you and your family. I offer my sincere condolences.
- A wonderful man has passed away. My condolences to you, my dear, and to your entire family at this sad and difficult moment.
“This tragedy has hurt all of us. But of course, it affected you the most. Accept my condolences.

How to condole in Islam (Muslims)?

Expressing condolences is Sunnah in Islam. However, it is undesirable for the relatives of the deceased to gather in one place to receive condolences. The main purpose of expressing condolences is to encourage people who have suffered misfortune to be patient and content with the predestination of Allah. The words that should be spoken when expressing condolences are: “May Allah grant you beautiful patience and may He forgive the sins of your deceased (your deceased).”

How to send condolences over the phone?

In the case when words of condolences are spoken over the phone, you can (but not necessarily) add briefly: “May the earth rest in peace!” If you have the opportunity to provide assistance (organizational, financial - any), then this phrase is convenient to complete your words of condolences, for example, “These days you will probably need help. I would like to be of assistance. Count on me, call me any time!”

How to deal with someone experiencing loss?

It is not necessary to grieve, cry with him, letting someone else’s suffering pass through him. You will be much more effective in your help if you act rationally and thoughtfully. One way to cope with a loss is to talk about it repeatedly. In this case, strong emotions will be reacted. You need to listen carefully to the person, answer his questions if necessary. Allowing a person to express his emotions and experiences. It could be tears, anger, irritation, sadness. You don’t make judgments, you just listen carefully and are nearby. Tactile contact is possible, that is, you can hug a person, take a hand, or sit a child on your lap.

No 5

When a loved one dies, those around them rush to express their regret to his relatives. But how to properly show your gratitude to them and respond to condolences, because the word “thank you” is not very appropriate now?

Mourning etiquette

If a person dies in your family, it is a time of difficult worries. First of all, you will have to inform everyone about the incident. This is not easy to do, but it is necessary.

According to mourning etiquette, you need to notify all your acquaintances, even if they are far away and even those whom you personally do not like, but may have had a good relationship with the deceased.

For those who live nearby, it is better to inform them when you meet, but it is impossible to get around everyone; there is an option to send messages by email or SMS, but this is not very polite, and suddenly the person does not receive them. Therefore, it is better to call in person and say at least a few words. And also be sure to tell us where and when the funeral will be, leave your contact information so that people can clarify the information.

It turns out that you are in grief and you have to do a lot of things: communicate, run around shops and funeral homes. Nothing can be done, gather your will into a fist. Now this is the best thing you can do for the deceased - to see him off with dignity on his last journey.

People will come to the ceremony, some you don’t even know, they will want to express words of sympathy, think about how to react to them.

How to respond to condolences regarding a death?

There are no special rules on this topic; it is often difficult to find words in such situations. You can remain silent in response or simply nod, rest assured, everyone will understand your condition.

Or use template phrases:

• "Thank you";
• "You are very attentive";
• “I try not to lose heart, thanks to you it’s easier for me.”

Everyone has different characters, some want to spend these minutes alone, while others, on the contrary, are uncomfortable being left alone with their own thoughts. If you belong to the first category of people, don’t be shy.

Of course, you will have to worry about organizing the funeral, welcoming guests, everyone will be interested in knowing the details of what happened, especially when the death was unexpected.

But this does not mean that you should now talk a lot and listen to the lamentations of some aunt from a distant province. Accept her support and go about your business. Even if she is a little surprised by this behavior, it’s okay, explain later.

When you come to a funeral...

The opposite situation - you are paying a condolence visit, how to behave correctly? Remember some simple rules:

1. Do not dress flashily and brightly; dark colors are appropriate now: women in long skirts, men in suits;
2. Bring napkins or a handkerchief so you can wipe away your tears when your feelings become overwhelming. Or maybe someone present will need the supplies;
3. Remove large jewelry and leave large bags at home;
4. Have a conversation, but keep silence;
5. And don’t follow the coffin, let your relatives go ahead.

Do you understand that you need to approach your loved ones and communicate, show your participation, but you don’t know what words to use when expressing condolences? Take simple phrases:

• « It’s difficult for me to find the right words of consolation, but I sincerely sympathize with your grief»;
• « I'm deeply shocked by what happened, hang in there…»;
• « Let me offer you my condolences».

If you are far away at the time of the funeral, it’s okay; it is believed that you can communicate with your family at another time. This will not look like a belated reaction, on the contrary, you came as soon as you could, which means you remember and worry.

How should you respond to condolences about death?

Work colleagues, friends and acquaintances will begin to offer financial assistance or any other kind: transportation, a room for a funeral - whoever can.

It should be accepted - this is normal, you will agree that it is not superfluous. The main thing is not to bow out in gratitude and do not shower yourself with compliments, thank calmly. In this situation, you would have done the same.

And I would also like to warn you - the modern funeral industry works very quickly and with pressure. You will be surprised, but sometimes, before they have time to send the deceased to the morgue, people answer phone calls from funeral agencies who are in a hurry to express sympathy and offer services.

Take your time to take advantage of these offers, come to your senses first. The prices and capabilities of funeral companies are very different. In a couple of hours, when your thoughts have recovered a little, you will be able to more adequately evaluate the price list. Talk to your friends, they may offer advice or be able to help with transportation and other matters.

Funeral meal

After the burial, it is customary to invite people to the wake; everyone comes. Christians traditionally serve pancakes and kutya (a dish with wheat, nuts and raisins).

At the wake, those who wish to speak about the deceased, but it is not customary to say bad things; it is better to remain silent. What can you tell those present and how?

• It is better to perform standing;
• Start with the address: “Friends”, “Dear relatives”;
• Introduce yourself, tell us how you know the deceased;
• List his positive qualities. Even if you think that there were not many of them, the negative ones can be presented from the opposite side: grumpy- was critical of life, silly- trusting, stubborn- principled;
• You can remember interesting incidents from life. Sometimes people read corresponding poems, their own or the author's.

The main thing is not to delay the speech, there are others who want to, and this is not the case. Draw conclusions that the person did not live in vain, offer words of condolences, and give way to the next one.

The death of a loved one is always a difficult event, but you have to take care of business, organize the funeral process - you have to pull yourself together. To make it a little easier for you to think of how to respond to condolences, use the phrase templates that we have offered you.

The main thing is to remember - life goes on, a good memory of a deceased person can become his reward for everything he did.

Video: how to express condolences correctly?

In this video, Islam Abaev will tell you how best to express condolences regarding the death:

Often a person is not prepared for the death of family or loved ones. For such cases, you need to be able to express words of condolences, doing it sincerely. Condolence is a mutual experience of loss, a desire to share this pain. Grief shocks and devastates a person, so at such a moment he needs support, even with words, and he will decide for himself whether to accept it or not. Correctly chosen words of condolences will always provide the necessary support.

How to Express Condolences

• Be sensitive, vigilant, try to understand what the grieving person needs.
• Since the person is shocked at this moment, he will probably not pay attention to what exactly you say. It is more effective to hug the grieving person, press him to your chest, stay close to him, and offer help.
• An important aspect of expressing sympathy is sincerity. When choosing your words, remember that hypocritical expressions and attempts to imitate feelings that do not exist are unacceptable.
• If a person is venting to you, be quiet and listen.
• You should be careful about the form of expressing condolences in poetry; not everyone will understand this.
• You should not give the mourner advice and warnings like: “don’t kill yourself in vain,” “don’t worry like that,” at the moment it’s pointless.
• It is worth discarding the attempt to instantly calm a person down with the words: “he has gone to a better world,” “we are all not eternal,” “he has suffered,” and so on.

Condolences

Regarding the death of father, mother

• This world has lost a great personality...
• We were completely shaken by the news of his death. He was a righteous and courageous man, an honest and reliable friend. I knew him for so many years, I mourn with you...
• Our family is grieving, as are you. It is difficult and painful to lose those who have been with us for so many years.
• Your father was always ready to help. You can also count on our help...
• This is an irreparable loss. Together with you, it hurts us too. He did a lot for you, was a support, but now his desire is for you to quickly overcome this tragedy.
• Your loss is irreparable. But he left in our souls his immortal light and warm memories of days gone by.
• Having gone into eternity, his last wish is for you to live happily, no matter what!
• How painful it is for you at this difficult moment. After all, our parents invest so much in us! Their bright and good deeds will not be forgotten! This is the best honor for them.
• We have no one closer to our parents in the world! A person who has passed away continues to live in his righteous deeds. Let him be an example for all of us in difficult times. I sincerely sympathize with you for this loss!
• May our memory and gratitude be the best honor. And now we must stick together, count on my help. Parents are the image of God for us.
• Losing a mother is losing a part of yourself! Let me share your pain! Everlasting memory!

Regarding the death of a brother, sister

• I am shocked and it hurt me to hear about this tragedy. I will miss him.
• In memory of him, I am ready to support you at this moment...
• When loved ones leave, this is the worst thing. I mourn with you.
• She made a huge contribution to your upbringing. Your happy life will be her gratitude.
• Your sister was a bright and kind person. The world has become poorer without her.
• He often got us into trouble, but thanks to this we became better, we became stronger, we became kinder. Eternal memory to you, brother!

Regarding the death of a husband, wife, loved one

• He was everything to you! Keep his love in your soul! She will be the best memory.
• Our hearts, our memories will always keep warm memories of him...
• Having learned about what happened, we were crushed for a long time and did not know what to do. But tears will not help your grief; count on us to be with you throughout the ritual procession.
• I am deeply saddened by this news. It is impossible to experience these feelings painlessly. Whatever I say is just a consolation. I will be by your side to help you get through this shock...
• I wish I could find words to ease your pain, but I don’t know if there are such words in all the land.
• A loved one does not die, he just stops being around. In your soul and in our memory, your love will live forever.
• He was your support and protection in life, now he has become your guardian angel! Love binds you with invisible threads!

Regarding the death of a child

• Your grief is great, I am crushed along with you...
• This is indescribable pain! How can I help you? Count on my help...
• I know how much you loved him. He was your whole world, which collapsed overnight! All I can do is share your grief.
• My condolences. Parental love is the strongest. The pain is inexpressible. But at this moment, the best memory of him will be to control himself. We will be by your side and help...
• It is unlikely that we will ever understand why God takes away our young people! You can go crazy from such pain. But, you need to continue to live! Be strong!
• Children are the most important thing we have. God forbid someone to experience such a loss! My sincere condolences...
• When we heard this news, we were speechless. We feel your pain, it is enormous. Always count on our help!
• It is a great human grief to lose a mother. But there is no greater grief than losing a son. Our condolences! We share your pain!
• This sad news shook us like thunder. Be strong, we will always be there...

Acquaintances, friends

• I sympathize with your grief.
• Kingdom of heaven, may the earth rest in peace...
• I see how dear he was to you, please accept my condolences...
• News of death is the most painful and depressing. I can't believe it! My heart also hurts from what I heard. No matter what, you need to continue to live and remember this person with kind words.
• When grief comes to the house, no one is ready for it. And the pain is great! I will help you take this blow of fate...
• I am completely saddened by the news of your loss. Words are unlikely to help, and it is inexpressible. Is there anything I can do for you in this situation?
• At the moment of life loss, we understand what is most important to us. Seeing the grief that has overtaken you, I will refuse words! But remember, I am nearby!

It should be understood that at a funeral a funeral speech is made, which is addressed to the entire circle of guests. A funeral is a rather difficult event and relatives choose a person with good diction and who knew the deceased well.

If you are reading a memorial speech, then you should not rely on improvisation; there is nothing wrong if you record the speech. Optimal speaking time up to 5 minutes. You should not retell the entire biography of the deceased. The speaker must select the brightest, most important, good moments that highlight all the best qualities of the deceased.

Since you personally knew the deceased, you can remember a kind deed, good words, or moments, and also emphasize how significant this person was to you. At the end of the speech they usually talk about what the deceased taught us, what benefits he did, that he did not live his life in vain.

In a funeral speech, you cannot recall the shortcomings and bad deeds of the deceased; remember that good things can be said about a bad person. For example, if a person was greedy, then we can say that although he did not always know how to share joy with others, he is an example for us of how to be happy ourselves and achieve everything with our own work! In this way, guests will learn about the deceased, his busy life, and good deeds.

Warm words warm the souls of guests and relatives, thus making the loss easier to bear.

An example of composing a speech:

1. Appeal:

Dear guests [Name]!
-Dear relatives and friends!
-Dear family and friends of our beloved [Name]

2. Who you are:

I am the husband of our revered [Name].
-I am the sister of [Name] whom we remember today.
-[Name] and I have worked/served together for a long time/in recent years.

3. About how it all happened:

My mother was ill for a long time; we understood what would happen, but when we got a call from the hospital...
-When I found out that [Name] died, that evening I couldn’t think about anything else.
-Although my grandfather lived a long life, the news of his death shocked me.
-Today is 9 days since my mother left us.
-A year ago we said goodbye to [Name], a respected and worthy person.

4. A few words about the best qualities of the deceased:

Grandmother was the kindest person, often receiving guests in her cozy house in the village.
-She was very generous, and her smile gave everyone a good mood.
-He was known as an optimist and a person with whom it was easy to go through life.
“He was a support for all of us; you could always rely on him in difficult times.

Remember that the eulogy at a funeral must come from your heart, just take a pen and write about what is in your soul, describe the deceased. It’s better if your speech is not formally correct, but sincere, which will touch the hearts of the guests.

Example of a funeral speech There are few facts from life here, but the speech was spoken from the heart:

Dear relatives and friends! I am the husband of our revered [Name]. Having learned about the tragedy, I could not believe what had happened for a long time, I could not think about anything all evening and it still seems to me that this was just a dream.
Not many people know how pure and bright a person [Name] was. Already at the age of 18, she made her first journey, and this passion for seeing new things remained forever in her heart. We met on one of these trips; it was an unforgettable month in an unforgettable city.
We both considered ourselves free as birds, and did not want to tie the knot, but this acquaintance turned everything upside down. She was an incredibly kind and sympathetic person. She always helped strangers, always took into account the opinions of others and avoided conflicts. I’m glad that, although for so little, I was with her and was able to enjoy the purity, tenderness and feelings that [Name] gave me. I will always remember you [Name], your warm smile will forever remain in our hearts!

What do they say at funerals?

At the wake, everyone can show their respect to the deceased. If you want to honor the memory of a loved one, prepare in advance, come up with a nice toast or poem to stand at the memorial table and honor the memory of your loved one.

Before sitting down to the table, the deceased is honored with a minute of silence. Orthodox Christians begin the commemoration by reading Psalm 90 and the Lord’s Prayer. The owner of the house invites guests to the table and people sit down without sitting in the empty place allocated to the deceased.

First word given to the owner of the house: -Today we saw off our loved one on his last journey (calls him as was customary in the family). May he/she rest in peace and may his/her memory be eternal. (Bows to the portrait or empty space of the deceased).

Everyone drinks (according to tradition, jelly). Without clinking glasses. Then the word is given to the presenter. The presenter also makes his speech, concluding it with the words: - May the earth (says the name and patronymic of the deceased) rest in peace, and may the memory be eternal!

Then the leader gives mourning words to everyone from the elders to the minority: As a rule, these are toasts, at the end of which they say May [Name] rest in peace, and may the memory be eternal!

In memorial words, the use of aphorisms, favorite expressions of the deceased, and stories from life is allowed. Any negative words, conversations about bad character traits, or showdowns are not allowed.

Example: Friends, today is a day of sorrow. There was a time when we had fun and rejoiced with someone who left us. But today you and I drink this cup of sorrow ourselves, seeing off a person close to us on their last journey. Not everyone in the world was honored with the Dormition, like the Mother of God and other holy people. But we will keep in our hearts the good memory of our friend, having hope for resurrection and a new meeting in a new place. Let's drink to the dregs the wine of sadness!

Example: We are sad and sad and there are no other feelings. Let's remember all the parents, Let's remember all the relatives! Let us remember all those who have passed away, In the prime of their lives, Brothers, sisters of the dead, Acquaintances and strangers! They once lived and made us happy, laughed and loved, took care of us. For a long time or recently They are no longer with us, And we reverently bring a bouquet to the grave!

Or just incidents from life, someone will remember how well he drew, someone will remember how wonderful they worked together, and someone will talk about his good deed.

Example: “Our grandfather was a very kind and good person. His path was long and difficult. He perceived all the difficulties that befell the country as his own. He worked and raised children without complaining about the lack of benefits, lack of food or amenities. He raised children and was a support for his grandchildren. This magnificent man will be greatly missed by all of us. May his memory be blessed!”

The funeral words must be said while standing. After your funeral words, the head of the family must end your words with the phrase - May the earth (says the name and patronymic of the deceased) rest in peace, and may the memory be eternal! Or for the believers the Kingdom of heaven and eternal peace for him/her.

When everyone has spoken, the head of the house thanks everyone for their kind words and once again wishes everyone to be strong in order to survive the bitterness of loss and remain firm at all times. Everyone gets up, drinks, bows and sits down again. According to tradition, the last toast is made by the eldest woman in the family, or the eldest relative. She also thanks everyone for coming and honoring the memory of the deceased and, if necessary, invites everyone to the next commemoration. After the last toast, they do not say goodbye, but bow to the portrait of the deceased (or an empty place at the table) and on the way out they offer words of condolences to the relatives.

How to express condolences over a death?

What should you not say? Often on such difficult days, it is very difficult for us to formulate our thoughts and express our condolences correctly. We begin to speak in general phrases, instead of simply supporting people dear to us in difficult times. Let's consider what it is better not to say when expressing your condolences:

2. God judged, everything was God’s will, God took it away. You cannot say such a phrase to a mother who has lost a small innocent child, thereby you seem to be saying that God did this to them. It is better to say that now a person is in a better world.

3. How are you? There is no need to dryly ask relatives how they are doing; if there is a need to maintain a conversation, it is better to ask how you are feeling? What's on your mind? However, if you are not a loved one, then just inquire about the funeral itself and ask if there is anything I can do for you.

4. Everything will be fine, don't cry! You should not try to cheer up the relatives of the deceased with such expressions; after all, this is mourning and these days relatives most often want to think about today, and not about the future.

5. Future-oriented wishes do not belong to words of condolences: “I wish you to come to your senses quickly after such a tragedy”

6. It is considered bad form to find positive aspects in a tragedy and devalue the loss. No problem, give birth again! He was very sick and finally got over it! Remember that people here have gathered to honor the memory of the deceased.

7. You’re not the only one, it can be worse, that’s what happened with…..Such statements are tactless and do not help in any way to alleviate the pain of loss.

8. You can’t look for someone to blame. We hope this driver goes to jail! We hope this killer will be punished. Such statements also do not apply to words of condolences.

9. “You know, he drank a lot and was a drug addict, people like that don’t live long.” Such statements are also tactless, about the deceased it’s either good or nothing.

10. Questions “How and where did this happen?” and others, it is also not appropriate to ask when expressing condolences.

Verbal condolences to the loved ones of the deceased

The most important thing is that your words of condolences are sincere and from the heart. For example, if you did not know the deceased and his relatives well, then a simple handshake or hug with words of condolences for your loss will be enough. The same applies to people who simply have no words or only two words, I sympathize with you. You can simply hug, take your hand, put your hand on your shoulder, thereby showing that you sincerely sympathize and share your grief with the relatives of the deceased.

It is considered good form to offer your help, ask if there is something I can do for you? Most often they will politely answer you, no thanks, no need. But if help is really needed, then it can be help in preparing dishes for the funeral, in submitting notes to the church for conducting church liturgies for the deceased, and even financial assistance.

How to find words of condolences for a death?

To make it easier to express your condolences, think about the deceased, who he was to you, remember good incidents from life, his actions and joint affairs. Also think about the feelings of your loved ones, how hard it is for them, how they feel. This will help you choose words for your condolences.

If you feel guilty about something before the deceased, your sincere apologies will be good form, because condolences are both forgiveness and reconciliation. There is no need to squeeze words out of yourself, if there are none, then just come up and sincerely say how you condole, everything will be visible in your eyes. Below are examples of words of condolences:

He meant a lot to me and to you, I mourn with you. Let it be a consolation to us that he gave so much love and warmth.

Let's pray for him. There are no words to express your sorrow.

She meant a lot in your life and mine. Never forget…

It is very difficult to lose such a dear person. I share your grief. How can I help you? You can always count on me.

I'm very sorry, please accept my condolences. If I can do something for you, I will be very glad.

I would like to offer my help. I would be happy to help you...

Unfortunately, in this imperfect world we have to experience this. He was a bright man whom we loved. I will not leave you in your grief. You can count on me at any moment.

This tragedy affected everyone who knew her. Of course, it’s harder for you now than anyone else. I want to assure you that I will never leave you. And I will never forget her.

Please, let's walk this path together. Unfortunately, I only now realized how unworthy my bickering and quarrels with this bright and dear person were.

Excuse me! I mourn with you. This is a huge loss. And a terrible tragedy. I pray and will always pray for you and for him.

It is difficult to express in words how much good he did to me. All our differences are dust. And what he did for me, I will carry with me throughout my life. I pray for him and grieve with you. I will be happy to help you at any time.