It becomes easier when you cry. Why do people cry? How to learn this again

From time to time, every person wants to cry, regardless of gender and age. It has long been scientifically proven that crying helps relieve excess tension in the nervous system and promotes emotional release. But what if you want to cry all the time or very often? Is such a desire a symptom of some serious disorder?

Why do you often want to cry?

If you want to cry often, for the most insignificant reasons, or even without them, this is not the norm. This desire is caused by certain physiological changes in the body or psychological reasons.

One of the most common reasons why you want to cry all the time is changes in hormonal levels. This trouble often befalls women. Hormonal levels change with the onset of pregnancy, after childbirth, and after completion of breastfeeding. Often the hormonal balance is disturbed after an abortion, in the event of a miscarriage or a missed abortion. During menopause, hormonal levels change greatly, and this causes a woman to feel many unpleasant symptoms. Hormonal imbalance also occurs in men as a consequence of a number of diseases, alcohol and cigarette abuse, and also against the background of chronic stress.

Both women and men in the case of hormonal changes are characterized by similar symptoms: excess weight gain, decreased sex drive, feeling of constant fatigue, even after a full night's sleep. “I want to cry all the time,” people complain at a psychologist’s appointment. Both men and women suffering from hormonal imbalance note frequent mood swings, women complain about the appearance of tearfulness. Moreover, you want to cry in the most inappropriate places and for no apparent reason. Men also feel the urge to cry, they just complain about it much less often.

Chronic fatigue, recently experienced severe emotional stress can also cause tearfulness. If you cannot get enough sleep and relax at least a little for a long time, metabolic processes in the body are disrupted, the nervous system is depleted, and immunity is reduced. A chronically sleep-deprived person becomes irritable, whiny, has a feeling of apathy, is absent-minded and forgetful. If sleep deprivation lasts long enough, it can lead to serious illnesses, including stroke and diabetes.

Presence of intrapersonal conflict often also becomes the reason for the desire to cry frequently, and can also lead to reactions such as sudden changes in mood, causeless aggression, long-term (sometimes up to several weeks) increase in body temperature, exacerbation of chronic diseases or the development of psychosomatic diseases. Intrapersonal conflicts arise when diametrically opposed desires, needs, values, goals and ideals collide within a person’s personality. For example, such a conflict is often typical for female managers - after all, on the one hand, they are required to be completely dedicated at work, and on the other hand, they want to be good wives and mothers.

What should I do if I want to cry?

If tearfulness is associated with postpartum depression, they usually advise you to just wait. When breastfeeding improves and hormonal levels stabilize, everything will return to normal. If you experience tearfulness and other troubles associated with menopause, you should consult a doctor - he will select medications that will help you get through this difficult time for a woman with the least discomfort.

In any case, if you suspect a hormonal imbalance, it is better to consult a doctor. After all, the result of hormonal imbalance can be not only obesity, chronic fatigue and tearfulness, but later serious diseases begin to develop against this background. The doctor will give a referral for a blood test for hormones and if the diagnosis is confirmed, he will select special hormonal therapy.

If a constant desire to cry, irritation and absent-mindedness are associated with chronic fatigue and lack of sleep, then you need to take a time out and get some rest, because all of the above symptoms are a signal from the body: “Master, give me rest, I’m not getting enough sleep, a little more and we’ll get sick.” ! There is nothing more valuable than a good night's sleep. If your workload is so heavy that you have to sacrifice sleep, you need to urgently take measures to redistribute your time. If you start being a hero, your body will take revenge. You won't be able to win anyway - after all, in the case of chronic lack of sleep, a person begins to work more slowly, and attention is scattered, and the likelihood of errors in work increases. If a young mother does not get enough sleep, she definitely needs help. If there is no one to help, then sleep at least when the child sleeps.

As for intrapersonal conflicts, recognizing their presence in oneself is sometimes very difficult. Here you may need the help of a specialist. If hormonal imbalance and chronic fatigue are excluded, and irritability, a feeling of dissatisfaction and a constant desire to cry do not leave you, you should consult a psychologist, because unresolved intrapersonal conflicts ultimately lead to very real and not at all harmless diseases.

You should not hesitate to visit a psychologist in the case when, after severe stress associated with events such as the loss of loved ones or divorce, tearfulness, anxiety, and a feeling of hopelessness arise and this condition persists for several months.

What if it's depression?

Such a dangerous disease as depression can also be accompanied by a frequent desire to cry, a feeling of apathy, weakness, and exacerbation of chronic diseases. Characteristic symptoms of depression are also the following: the patient is not happy with anything, nothing can give him pleasure, he is constantly tormented by anxiety, accompanied by melancholy, a feeling of depression and thoughts of suicide. A sick person sees absolutely everything in a black light: the world around him, himself and his future.

You need to know that depression is not weakness, not the inability to pull oneself together - it is precisely a disease, and it requires special treatment. In the absence of such treatment, patients in the vast majority of cases die by committing suicide.

Depression is chemical in nature. Due to severe or very long-term stress, a deficiency of chemicals occurs in the body - neuromoderators, which ensure the normal state of brain tissue and the functioning of the brain. A deficiency of neuromoderators, in particular serotonin, norepinephrine and dopamine, leads to the above symptoms. To treat depression, medications are needed - antidepressants, which replenish the deficiency of substances vital for brain activity and restore mental health.

In mild cases, herbal preparations are sufficient; in more severe cases, serious complex therapy is required; sometimes, in order to maintain a normal level of neuromoderators, a person needs to constantly take antidepressants, like a diabetic patient needs insulin.

It is very difficult to identify depression in yourself, but if you notice its symptoms in loved ones, do not hesitate, be sure to find a way to consult a good psychotherapist and begin treatment.

If you pay attention to small children, you will see that if they rejoice, it is with all their hearts, and if they cry, then with all their hearts and in such a way that it is difficult to stop them. And if they cry, it is so inconsolable that it seems that there is only pain in the world and nothing and no one will calm them down.

But this is exactly how this pain in this world goes away. I'm always amazed. You cry like this for an evening or a day (depending on the severity of the situation) and in the morning you notice that life is somehow easier and everything is not so scary. Psychologists call this “quality” crying. Children know how to cry like that, but adults have already forgotten how. Why?

It is very difficult, almost impossible for parents to tolerate a child's crying. Not because they are cruel or don’t like children, or they are tired. Parents feel helpless, they don’t know how to help their child, they also feel pain and despair. At such moments, it is very difficult to simply “be there” and comfort the child. This is where the parent words come from:

Do not Cry

Let's not cry, and you and I will buy a new toy (candy)

Stop crying

Or it could be worse:

No one will love such a capricious girl!

How many times have we discussed it! Are you disgracing us?

Are you a girl?!

In the future, as we grow older, we lose the invaluable ability to cry, and therefore experience uncomfortable emotions. Feelings of resentment, shame, guilt, and disappointment can torment us for years. Subsequently, people may even cease to understand why they feel bad. There is discomfort, I want to cry, but I don’t know why. These feelings torment us, turning into depression, melancholy, and depression.

How to learn this again?

It is very important to cry about what you are grieving. As an adult, you accumulate so many grievances and pain that it is unclear where your “legs are coming from.” As I wrote above: there is discomfort, the state is tearful, but why it is such a state is not clear. It is necessary to feel childhood traumas and grievances under the accumulated layer of other pain.

Crying to someone in whose presence you feel safe. It's like being a parent when you're a child. It’s always so nice when a mother can hug, feel sorry for, stroke, listen to, bring some water, cover with a blanket. If there is no such safe person, then it is important that we can become this person ourselves. Our childish part grieves and cries. Our inner Parent “is nearby” (which, most likely, our parents were not able to do in our childhood).

Third and most important, because the most difficult thing: you need to give yourself permission to these feelings. Allow yourself to be defenseless, whiny, grieving. Don't judge or criticize yourself. “It’s worth the tears, because it’s so bitter,” “Cry and it will become easier,” “I’ll make myself some tea now,” “Of course, this is terribly offensive,” etc.

You will see that life will gradually sparkle with new colors. Along with the ability to experience pain, you will see that the ability to rejoice will return.

“I cry all the time—whether there is a reason or not!” What to do with tears over trifles if they interfere with a normal life? And why do people cry for no reason? Excessive emotionality since childhood? Not at all.

The modern rhythm of life is accompanied by regular stress, haste and tension. Surely, each of us, against the background of overwork, was overtaken by sudden, causeless tears. Let's try to figure out what are the causes and consequences of this phenomenon. And let's look at simple practical ways to cope with the problem.

Why do people cry for no reason?

Everyone has probably thought about where crying for no reason comes from when they are in a difficult emotional situation. Even when . You have probably witnessed or been a participant in such a picture. We remember that tears are an expression of emotions accumulated in our body. But what exactly can trigger tears for no reason?

Reasons why you want to cry for no reason

1. Accumulated neuroses and stress.

   Stress overtakes us at work, in transport, on the street, at home. That the most amazing irritation and nervousness often arises on vacation, where a person does not expect it at all. It is almost impossible to predict and prevent such a phenomenon. Negative emotions consume us and accumulate in the body. They negatively affect our nervous system, weakening it.

   Without realizing it, we become “exhausted” from overwork and stress. And tears for no reason become the body’s reaction to emotional overload, which our exhausted nervous system is not able to cope with on its own.

2. Severe stress due to long-standing events.

   The human brain is capable of absorbing and remembering the most vivid moments. We are talking about positive and negative phenomena. Even if it seems to you that everything has long passed and been forgotten, memories are stored at the level of the subconscious, which is sometimes capable of behaving unpredictably. Why do they cry for no reason at the most unpredictable moments, when everything seems to be fine? Try to look for the cause of sudden tears in the past - perhaps you have not been able to let go of some events. Maybe it's a reaction to a memory. Your brain has found something “painful” in a specific situation, movie, music track. And he reacted with unexpected and causeless tears.

3. Disturbances in the body.

   Unreasonable tears can also occur against the background of hormonal imbalances. Most often society. An excess or deficiency of certain substances in the body affects a person’s emotional state. Along with the “tearful” reaction, the body produces other unforeseen consequences - weight loss or gain, drowsiness or insomnia, poor or increased appetite.

   If the tears that appear on their own are not accompanied by emotional stress and a disturbance in the emotional state, consult an ophthalmologist. It happens that you don’t want to cry, but tears appear involuntarily. This can also be caused by a blockage or cold in the eye canal. At the same time, unpleasant sensations may occur in the corners of the eyes.

“I constantly cry for no reason, what should I do about it?”

If, in addition to causeless tears, you begin to notice other problems in the body, you should definitely make an appointment with a doctor. Perhaps you are lacking some substance in your body and it would not hurt to get tested for thyroid hormones. In any case, a specialist will examine you and help identify and eliminate the root of the problem. If necessary, he will refer you to see a psychotherapist, whom you did not consider necessary to go to on your own.

But if causeless tears are caused by chronic fatigue, rest is indicated for you. Based on the situation, choose the best course of action. Evening walks before bed and relaxing baths will help cope with irritability. Or maybe you need a day off for good sleep? And if you haven’t gone anywhere for a long time, plan a picnic or fishing for the weekend. Rest helps to cope with the consequences of chronic neurosis and normalize the nervous system.

How to react to causeless crying?

Where's the best place to cry?

Even strong people have the right to tears and there is no need to be afraid of it.
If you really want to cry, it’s better to cry in a psychologist’s office, at the same time together you will find the real reason and be able to solve your problems.
Suppressing feelings and emotions is much more dangerous.

“I often cry for no reason. What to do when tears appear at the most inopportune moment - at work, on the street or in public places?

First of all, do not be alarmed by this reaction of the body. If your emotionality suddenly manifested itself, even attracting the attention of others, this is not the worst thing in life. You can handle everything. If for some reason you feel like crying for no reason, there is still a reason. You need to look for her. But first of all, you need to calm down. Try the following techniques if you experience sudden tears:

1. Talk.

   Moral support from a loved one is a great way to cope with emotions, calm down and look at what is happening in a new way. Sometimes talking with a stranger can save you. Without fearing the reaction of loved ones, you simply express what worries you. Against the backdrop of emotional unloading, sudden tears also occur.

2. Self-control.

   If you often find yourself in tears for no reason, you will have to learn to control them. This cannot be done without initial efforts. Don't try - it won't do much good. It’s better to consciously set yourself to calm down. Take a deep breath several times, follow your breath, focus on it, get up, drink water, try to switch your attention to any object around - look at it and tell yourself about it: what color it is, why it is here, etc. Your job is to shift your thoughts to something that doesn't cause you to have an obvious emotional reaction. Try to achieve complete muscle relaxation and redirect the flow of thoughts, this will help you calm down.

3. Medication assistance.

   Any pharmacological drug must be taken as prescribed by a doctor. But you can also purchase a complex of vitamins on your own - despite the popular belief that causeless tears need to be “treated,” it doesn’t hurt to do some simple prevention. Vitamins and mild sedatives are suitable if you often feel anxious or upset. There is no need to shy away from medical support; your nervous system requires care just like other body systems.

4. Help from a psychoanalyst.

   There is no need to be afraid of psychotherapists. Do you feel that it has become difficult for you to cope with surging emotions? Or maybe causeless tears began to “attack” you very often? Make an appointment with a specialist. Your doctor will help you determine the cause of your increased emotionality. In the process of a simple conversation, you yourself will reveal to him your irritant. It is easier for a psychoanalyst to understand what provokes your condition. Unreasonable tears can occur against the background of regular nagging from the boss, inattention from the husband or misunderstanding of the children, or they can hide much more serious psychological disorders, which are almost impossible to cope with on your own.

Only by understanding the causes of tearfulness can you find the best way to solve this problem. Learn to respond to disruptions in your body in a timely manner to avoid unexpected emotional shocks. Take care of yourself. If your body gives a signal - it will be crying for no reason or other manifestations - do not let them pass your attention. Your body will thank you.

According to statistics, women cry on average 47 times a year, while men only 7 times. But you can cry more often with a light heart and it will only benefit you.

And that's why.

STRESS AND TENSION

Tears always arise from some kind of experience. Except when you're peeling onions, of course. And these experiences, whether they are joyful or bitter, require their release. There is nothing worse than gathering a fist at this moment and squeezing your emotions. This way you will only destroy your nervous system.

Do you want to cry? Cry. You see that a person is crying - let him cry, don’t stop him. According to medical research, 88.9% of people feel a significant improvement in their condition after crying. And only 8.4% - deterioration.

CRYING LOWERS BLOOD PRESSURE

When you cry, your heart rate decreases and your blood pressure decreases. This is another study conducted with participants in psychotherapy groups, during which they cried a lot and from the heart.

CRYING RELIEFS PAIN

Our body is designed in such a way that during crying a large amount of hormones are produced that reduce pain. Therefore, it doesn’t matter if you got burned or if he didn’t call back - you will feel better if you cry.

TEARS MAKE YOU HAPPIER

Paradoxical? No. If you allow yourself to experience the full range of emotions, without avoiding even the most difficult ones, you will more keenly experience those moments when you are truly happy. This is a kind of mental gymnastics.

Conversely, low emotionality is most likely associated with mental problems. Agree, a person who reacts to the news of the birth of his son and to the news of the death of his beloved dog with the same “oh, I see” is at least suspicious.

THIS WILL ALLOW YOU TO BREATHE EASIER

Tears pass through the tear duct and nasal passage, where they come into contact with mucus. We all sniffle when we cry. And this is good and correct, this is how nature intended everything.

THIS PROTECTS YOUR EYES

Okay, we've dealt with the emotional tears. There are tears left that arise from eye irritation. Dust, wind, the smell of onions or peppers - all this causes profuse lacrimation. Take your time to wipe your eyes to preserve your makeup. Allow yourself to cry and clear your eyeballs of all irritants. Tears, among other things, also disinfect your eyes.

Hint: if you cry because you rubbed your eyes with your hands after cutting hot pepper, do not rush to wash your face with water. It just won't help. Capsaicin, the main hot substance in peppers, does not dissolve in water. It is fat soluble. Therefore, wash your hands with full-fat milk, cream or vegetable oil, and wash with soap. And after that, just wash your face with the same fats. Clean hands.

Based on materials

When we worry, a cascade of physiological reactions is triggered - the body comes into a state of stress. At the same time, the heartbeat and breathing increase, concentration increases, muscle tone increases - the body does everything to quickly and effectively respond to an extraordinary event. This is possible thanks to the work of the main stress hormone, cortisol, which is secreted by the adrenal glands in response to alarming signals from the brain.

Cortisol controls signal transmitter molecules in the brain called neurotransmitters. These molecules trigger or inhibit physiological reactions, including the production of tears running down the cheeks. One of these neurotransmitters, acetylcholine, regulates the secretion of most glands in the body: it controls the salivary, sweat and digestive glands. It also stimulates the production of tears in the lacrimal glands, which are located under the eyebrow arch in the outer corners of the eyes.

In fact, stress and tears are our body’s defense mechanisms.

Tears can be of three types:

1. Basal tears:are produced constantly and moisturize the eyeball, washing away small specks.
2. Reflex tears:act as a protective mechanism in case of irritation in the eye area.
3. Emotional tears:are triggered by an excess of feelings (both positive and negative).

All three types are somewhat different in composition, but no matter what provokes the process, it proceeds the same way: the lacrimal gland produces tears, which enter the eyes through the lacrimal canaliculus and wash them when blinking. Then, through other tubules in the inner corners of the eyes, tears flow into the nasal cavity. At this moment, the nasal mucosa is actively supplied with blood and swelling develops, which feels like nasal congestion.

How and why crying causes headaches

The connection between sobbing and headaches is quite confusing: experts offer several theories of its development. It all depends on the type of headache.

Tension headaches

As a rule, tears associated with emotional experience cause tension headaches - the most common of all types of headaches. These are the ones that start at the end of a hard day at work. Despite its prevalence, the exact reasons for its development are still unknown, most likely it isincreased sensitivity to painful stimuli .

This pain is usually bilateral, as if a vice of moderate force is pressing monotonously in the frontal or occipital region of the head. It is not accompanied by nausea or discomfort from light, which distinguishes it from another type of headache - migraine.

Migraine

Stress, which is often accompanied by crying, is one of the main triggers for a migraine attack. In people predisposed to its development, the brain is especially sensitive to the level of neurotransmitters and other substances: if this balance is disturbed, a pain attack is triggered. Usually these are one-sided, throbbing pains that are quite difficult to endure. The attacks are accompanied by unpleasant sensations: nausea or vomiting, increased sensitivity to light or sounds.

The trigger, by the way, can be both stress itself and relaxation after it. It is important to understand that any migraine-causing factor is just a provocateur, not a cause. Migraine is considered a genetically determined disease, the development of which is caused by disturbances in several genes.

The remaining headaches - the so-called secondary - develop against the background of some condition.

Pain due to obstruction of the paranasal sinuses

Prolonged crying can affect the functioning of the sinuses or sinuses - air cavities that are located in the front part of the skull and communicate with each other. Since at the moment of tears flowing, swelling of the nasal mucosa develops and rhinorrhea begins - the release of a secretion that we unprosaically call snot - the air flow in the cavities is disrupted. There is a feeling of stuffiness, which can turn into a dull pain in the cheeks and forehead.

Pain due to muscle spasms

This type of pain is associated with overstrain of the muscles of the upper shoulder girdle: when we cry, the muscles of the neck, forehead and back of the head tense. If we cry for a long time and with feeling, the tension can persist even after we have calmed down and lead to a headache.

How to relieve a headache after crying

First of all, you need to rest. The prospect of spending the whole day in bed in pain is not very attractive, so it is worth speeding up your recovery.

You can start with cold or warm compresses at a comfortable temperature for you. Place them on the back of your head, in the neck or on your forehead: they can work as a distraction for the nerve endings, due to which they will stop constantly transmitting signals about pain impulses. Another good option to calm down is to take a hot or cold shower, whichever you prefer.

If your nose is stuffy, rinse it with saline solutions to get rid of snot. You can drop vasoconstrictor drops into your nose: they will relieve swelling and restore free breathing.

If you feel tension in the muscles of your neck or upper back, a massage from an experienced professional is an excellent treatment. The massage will relieve tension and spasms in the muscles, normalize blood flow, after which the pain will go away. Try self-massage: rub the muscles in the shoulder area and at the base of the neck.

Various manual therapies may be helpful in relieving headaches: e.g. acupuncture . If you don’t want to go to an alternative medicine session after crying, you can act on the trigger point yourself He Gu, or LI4 : It is located in the pad between the index finger and thumb. This active point is a collection of nerve endings, which can be massaged with rotational movements to relieve headaches.

If rest and the above steps do not provide relief, take simple over-the-counter medications (such as ibuprofen, paracetamol, aspirin). But there is no need to overuse painkillers - this can cause drug-induced headaches.

Sometimes tears are just one of the provocateurs of a headache, which can be perceived as an alarming signal from the body. If attacks occur more than once a week, consult a neurologist.