home Adviсe Safe positions for sleeping together with a baby. What are the benefits of co-sleeping with your baby? What are the advantages and disadvantages of co-sleeping with a baby?

Safe positions for sleeping together with a baby. What are the benefits of co-sleeping with your baby? What are the advantages and disadvantages of co-sleeping with a baby?

If previously the child slept separately from his parents, now the thesis about the benefits of such sleep is disputed by both psychologists and pediatricians. Tradition is being replaced by co-sleeping, which allows for the best psychological conditions for the baby. Its benefits have been confirmed by many doctors.

For example, the famous pediatrician William Sears conducted an experiment on the safety of a newborn's separate sleep. It turned out that without parents, the baby’s breathing and heartbeat problems increase.

Now let's look at this in more detail.

Pros and cons of co-sleeping with a newborn

Co-sleeping is a little-studied phenomenon for most parents. This raises many questions: is it safe? What exactly does SS provide?

Real advantages

Let's look at the benefits of sleeping with a parent:

Sleeping together brings peace of mind not only to the child, but also to the mother. Such close contact with the child allows you to constantly “feel” him, not be nervous, and eliminate unnecessary worries.

Sleeping together brings peace of mind not only to the child, but also to the mother.

Conditional disadvantages

Opponents of co-sleeping have their own arguments:

The disadvantages of SS are, as a rule, not facts, but lack of awareness.

In order to accurately resolve the issue of sleep organization, you need to study all the information about it. This way, parents will feel more confident and will not doubt the safety of the baby.

Proper organization of co-sleeping

All the disadvantages of SS can be reduced by properly organizing sleep. To do this, you need to follow the recommendations:

Parents are prohibited from taking alcohol, sleeping pills, and various psychotropic medications;
The baby should be placed separately if the parents are sick;
The baby should be full-term and not weakened;
Swaddling or wrapping a child in blankets is not recommended. All this can cause overheating. The best option is light pajamas;
The temperature in the room for newborns is 22 degrees, for babies who have reached six months – 18-20 degrees;
Humidity levels should be maintained. They should be 50-60%;
It is not recommended to use cosmetics with fragrances or perfumes;
A child should not sleep in the same bed with pets.

Proper organization of sleep allows you to neutralize all possible dangers.

The parent's bed must meet certain requirements:

A hard mattress with a flat surface to prevent breathing problems in infants;
Wide bed for comfortable accommodation;
Regular change of bed linen. It is better if it is cotton, breathable;
For safety, mother should not wear clothes made of artificial fabrics or with long ties at night;
A fence needs to be placed on the child’s side. For example, you can simply move a crib next to your parents' bed.

Proper organization of sleep allows you to neutralize all possible dangers. It is also important for ensuring the comfort of parents.

How to start correctly, as well as common mistakes of young parents in our article.
How long does a 1 month old newborn baby sleep? This information will help adults organize their day correctly.

Psychoanalyst's opinion about SS

Leading psychoanalyst Donald Winnicott says that without contact with the mother, the baby goes through a terrible experience that can harm its development. The child does not know when contact will be resumed and whether it will happen, which gives rise to severe anxiety and creates a feeling of loneliness.

The newborn is inseparable from the mother, and therefore co-sleeping is an inevitable consequence of this indissolubility.

The baby's sleep is superficial. During it, he feels the presence of his mother, which affects the quality of rest. SS reduces all these risks. Both baby and mother will not feel stressed.

When sleeping separately, the baby often falls into deep sleep to protect itself from stress, which can be dangerous. If there is a change in breathing, cold or overheating, the baby will not call for help.

In this video, a mother shares her experience of co-sleeping with her baby:

Sleeping together has a whole range of beneficial effects. It allows the baby to feel safe and protects against stress. The mother will be able to quickly respond to all the needs of the newborn. SS promotes proper mental development. However, it also requires competent organization. Parents need to take care of both the bed and bedding made from safe materials.

Sleeping with a newborn baby is a controversial topic. Both experts and parents have arguments both for and against. If you do decide to sleep with your child, make sure he is safe. Note that "co-sleeping with a newborn" can mean "sharing a bed with the newborn" or "sleeping in a bed next to the baby's crib" (the latter being more common). This article talks about how to sleep in the same bed as your baby.

Steps

Part 1

Think about the risks

Accept the fact that sleeping with your child in the same bed is not recommended. Many studies show that co-sleeping increases the risk of injuries, strangulation and other deaths. It is important to understand that there is no way to completely get rid of these risks, even if you try to somehow adapt to this situation so that it is safer for the child.

Most pediatricians recommend sleeping with your baby in the same room, rather than on the same bed.

Part 3

When is it better to stop co-sleeping?

Never sleep in the same bed with your child if you are under the influence of alcohol or drugs. Your co-sleeping can greatly affect your baby's condition and even harm him.

Avoid co-sleeping with your child if you or anyone else in the family smokes. According to research, the risk of SIDS (sudden infant death syndrome) increases significantly if the child's parents smoke.

Do not allow older children to sleep next to your baby. It is difficult for children to be aware of the baby's presence when they are sleeping. Even a small child can accidentally harm the baby if he simply rolls on him in his sleep.

Don't leave your baby to sleep alone in your bed. Children should not sleep in an adult's bed without the adult themselves. Even a small child can accidentally roll over and fall off the edge of the bed. In addition, he can suffocate if he becomes entangled in bedding (sheets, pillows and blankets).

You should not sleep next to your baby if you are exhausted from stress and lack of sleep. In deep sleep, you most likely won't react to your baby's every move.

Only you know how your baby behaves during the night and how soundly you sleep. If you are not sure whether you will be able to be aware of the presence of your baby nearby during your sleep, it is better to refuse to sleep together.

You should not sleep with your baby if you are overweight, especially if you have apnea (stopping breathing for a short time). Obesity is directly linked to sleep apnea, which increases the risk of suffocation during restless sleep.

Part 4

Prepare the room

Good day to all! Today we will talk to you about how to organize co-sleeping with a newborn baby. Some parents accustom their baby to his crib from birth, while others, on the contrary, immediately put the baby to themselves. What do experts say about this? Now you will find out about everything.

I’ll tell you about myself: from birth, both daughters slept in the same bed with us. For a couple of days I tried to get up every hour at night to feed, and decided to give up on this matter. I took it with me in the evening, breast in mouth and a quiet, restful sleep all night was guaranteed for all of us.

At the age of 3, the eldest daughter went to her own bed, now we are slowly weaning the youngest one too. She will also be 3 years old soon. But this is my personal experience and it was so convenient for me. But, only for me... not my husband.

Komarovsky, a famous pediatrician, does not put forward his categorical “for or against”. He says that a child should have his own sleeping place from birth. A family bed is intended for husband and wife, because a man also needs attention. But! He doesn't call for it. Each family must decide for itself whether it is comfortable for the three of them to sleep together? It is both spouses, and not just the wife or just the husband.

Those who have read Benjamin Spock (I had the book “The Child and His Care”) know that he advises that the child should be immediately placed in his own bed, and from six months of age moved to his own room. I don’t argue that it would be ideal to have a separate children’s room, but many simply cannot afford such living space.

I decided everything for us. I felt so comfortable. I didn’t want to get up at night, and neither did my husband. But he wanted to sleep without the child. I refused and, let me tell you, at first there were scandals, but soon my husband reconciled. So at least he got enough sleep. You see, there are “double standards” here.

I, like many doctors, believe that newborns need maternal warmth 24 hours a day, feeding on demand, and not according to a schedule. Co-sleeping leads to exactly this. Here are some more benefits of co-sleeping for baby and mom:

The baby is comfortable, cozy and warm next to his mother. He feels protected;
He is always full, as his mother immediately reacts to a hungry cry;
A nursing mother has ideally adjusted lactation thanks to on-demand feeding.
The whole family got a good night's sleep;
Newborns who sleep with their mother are less likely to experience random respiratory arrest.
Babies who sleep with their parents suffer less from colic, teething pain, and are less likely to have bad dreams.

What are the disadvantages of co-sleeping?

Doctors say that parents can simply crush the baby in his sleep. You know, I can argue with that. Before birth, I slept like an elephant, no matter what happens around me, I will still sleep. As soon as my daughter was born, I woke up from any rustle. My sleep became sensitive, so I reacted to any movement of my daughter. And she slept closer to the wall, away from her husband, who often tosses and turns in his sleep.

In addition, the child’s nose is snub-nosed, so he cannot suffocate unless 150 kg of live weight is placed on him.

Also, among the disadvantages, many highlight unhygienic conditions. I'll argue with this too. The child is in diapers and bed linen is changed twice a week. Where is the unhygienic situation here?

Intimate life is disrupted. This point especially angers men whose women chose to sleep with the child. Alas, this is a fact. And often families collapse because of this. Therefore, before you transfer the baby to the family bed, think about what will happen to your spouse. Are you ready to make such sacrifices?

Here are a few more disadvantages:

The likelihood of a child contracting colds if the parents are ill;
Some doctors claim that children sleeping in the family bed have mental retardation;
There is a risk of overfeeding babies.

When should you not go to bed with your child?

If the mother takes sedatives or sleeping pills, smokes, drinks. While intoxicated, she will not be able to react in time to the baby’s cry, and the baby may even suffocate or be poisoned by the vapors of ethyl alcohol and nicotine.
If parents are sick with viral diseases.
In the presence of skin diseases.
Do not place a newborn on a dented or soft bed, or on a pillow.
If the mother is pregnant, as the baby may push the tummy hard.

How to properly organize sleep with your baby?

Do not place the baby on the edge so that he does not fall in his sleep. Let him sleep against the wall (only it should be warm so that the child does not get too cold and does not get too cold). This way you can lie down comfortably to feed him, and your husband can hug you both if he wants.

The ideal position for feeding: you lie on your side, your head on the pillow, your arm under your head, and your other arm hugging your baby. This way you can breastfeed your baby at any time.

There are certain requirements for a sleeping place:

The mattress should be firm, as any unevenness can cause a child to suffocate.
The bed needs a wide one. If you are afraid that the baby will fall, then purchase a special side. They are not expensive, are easy to take off and put on and can ensure the safety of the baby.
Do not place the baby on the pillow. If you cover yourself with a large blanket, then the baby needs his own small blanket.
Wash and iron your bed linen regularly. It is advisable to buy a hypoallergenic powder.
If your bed is not too wide, you can move a child’s bed next to it by removing one side. They also now sell attached cradles, which will be very convenient. If desired, their side can be folded or put in place. This way, the child will not interfere with your life together with your spouse.
Spouses must exclude any intimacy in the family bed where their child sleeps.

The most important! The decision to co-sleep with a newborn should be made by both parents, not just the mother. You have already read all the arguments today.

Watch Komarovsky's video " Co-sleeping with a child»:

I advise every mother to familiarize herself with the course of lectures Life after childbirth . From them you will learn how to manage your emotions during the postpartum period, how to calm your baby, how to properly organize yourself, restore your figure and much more.

How do you sleep? Together with the baby or separately? I will be very glad to read your reviews and comments. Are you against or for co-sleeping?

Sleeping together with mom gives the baby a feeling of security and comfort. But experts have still not come to a consensus about the benefits or harms of co-sleeping. Let's try to “weigh” the pros and cons.

Co-sleeping: expert opinions

Many pediatricians believe that by putting your baby to sleep in bed next to you, you are risking his life. Health officials abroad share the same opinion. In particular, the US Department of Health and the Infant Mortality Research Foundation categorically state that the safest place for an infant is in its own crib in the parents' bedroom. The official opinion of the American Academy of Pediatrics is that it increases the likelihood of sudden infant death syndrome.

Researchers from the University of Bristol in the UK came to the same conclusion. However, it is worth making one important clarification: the British study involved nursing mothers who drank more than two servings of alcohol per day. So it would be more correct to say that a danger to the baby’s life is posed by co-sleeping with a mother who drinks, not to mention drug use. But we will talk about responsible parents.

What are the advantages and disadvantages of sleeping together with a baby?

Benefits of jointabout sleep for mom

Co-sleeping with a newborn makes it easier. The mother will not have to get out of bed, take the baby out of his crib, or sit down for feeding. You can breastfeed your baby without getting up, and then continue to sleep. Feeling the closeness of his mother even in his sleep, the baby sleeps more calmly and wakes up less often. When this happens, the mother usually feels it immediately, and the baby does not have time to cry too much. The child does not have to be calmed down for a long time, and the mother has more opportunity to get enough sleep. Night feedings increase breast milk production. This is especially true if the mother has hypogalactia. The more time mother and baby spend in close contact, the stronger the emotional closeness between them.

Benefits of co-sleeping for your baby

The baby sleeps better feeling his mother’s warmth and inhaling her smell. He hears her heartbeat in a dream, and this gives him a feeling of security and safety, because he heard this sound all nine months before birth. The baby’s brain processes the information received during the day during sleep, and if nighttime sleep is not interrupted or interrupted less frequently, the baby develops better. Some psychologists believe that a child who sleeps with his mother is less susceptible to fears and grows up to be more self-confident. Although there are no exact statistics on this matter.

Expert opinion

Anna Shepeleva, pediatrician, breastfeeding hotline consultant: Mom has the opportunity to rest, which means she smiles at her baby more often. And the child receives food in a timely manner and in sufficient quantities, the proximity of the mother gives him warmth, affection, protection and peace.

But the famous pediatrician Dr. Komarovsky believes that sleeping together between mother and child has more disadvantages than advantages.

Disadvantages of co-sleeping with your baby

Parents will pass on their germs to their baby. This flaw is imaginary. A nursing mother, even without sleeping together, has so much contact with her baby that they have common microbes. As for dad, the issue is easily resolved by maintaining hygiene in general (clean bed linen, showering before bed, etc.).
The presence of a baby in bed with his mother disrupts the intimate life of the parents. A real drawback. What should I do? There is no general recipe for everyone; each family solves this issue in its own way.
When the child gets used to sleeping together, it will be difficult. Parents will need patience to wean their baby away from what he is used to.
A baby's sleep with his mother, especially after a year, can lead to excessive dependence of the child on his mother in the future.
And the last drawback is the last one on the list, but not least! There is, although not too great, a chance of crushing a child in his sleep. Usually nursing mothers sleep very lightly, but if a girl is very tired during the day, then she may “fall” into sleep so that it will not be easy to wake her up. There is a risk of accidentally turning the baby in a dream so that he buries his face in a pillow or blanket, or covering his nose with your hand or chest.

If you are planning to co-sleep with your baby, it is worth remembering safety measures!

Co-sleeping safety precautions

Both parents must be non-smokers!
You can only sleep on the bed. A folding sofa, no matter how wide it is, is not a suitable bed for sleeping with a baby!
The baby should lie on the bed between the mother and the wall, but not between the parents and not on the edge, from where he could fall to the floor.
The mattress should be hard, the same as needed for a crib.
The mother's pillow should be small and not too soft, so that there is no risk that the baby will suffocate if he accidentally buries his face in the pillow during sleep. The baby doesn't need a pillow!
The bed should be wide enough: mother and baby need approximately 60-70 cm width each.
The baby should have his own blanket; placing it under an adult blanket is dangerous: you can accidentally cover your head. In addition, the baby may overheat under the parent's blanket, which increases the risk of sudden infant death.
If you sleep with a child, you should not be wearing jewelry: earrings, chains around your neck, etc.

Co-sleeping with a child: up to what age?

Once your baby stops waking up at night to feed, co-sleeping becomes less important for breastfeeding. But the child may not want to sleep at night. If it was not possible to do this earlier, then a good period for switching to separate sleep occurs at the age of 2-3 years, when the baby’s desire for independence awakens.

Future parents are unlikely to think about sleeping with their child. But when he is born, the young mother has to get up every two hours, feed, and rock the baby. It is not always possible to put a sleeping baby in a crib without him shuddering and waking up. Therefore, it is easier to put it next to you - near your chest. Is this correct, and what are the disadvantages of co-sleeping?

FOR co-sleeping with your baby

Experienced mothers believe that sleeping with a child is very convenient, since it has many positive aspects, and do not see any problems in this. There is no need to get up in the middle of the night, go to the crib, or carry the baby, since he sleeps well at the breast and, when necessary, latches onto it. But, having had a good night’s sleep, my mother gets up in the morning cheerful and full of strength.

Besides:

Next to the mother, the child is warm, which is very important when the heat exchange process is unstable. He feels safe, and this has a beneficial effect on the development of the nervous system;
You can always straighten a blanket, a diaper, or a baby’s cap that has slipped off his head in time;
next to the calm breathing of the parents, the newborn will sleep more soundly, and his breathing will be regulated in a natural way;
co-sleeping affects the infant's superficial sleep phase, which predominates over the deep one. This helps prevent sudden respiratory arrest in newborns;
The baby's brain develops in the superficial phase. Parents who believe that a baby should sleep on his own deprive him of his natural opportunity to develop faster;
The baby, falling asleep in the parents' bed, cries less. If he starts to wake up and be capricious, his mother can immediately calm him down, without waiting for desperate crying;
the mother worries less when the baby is next to her rather than sleeping on her own;
Sleeping with a baby promotes the production of hormones responsible for lactation.

Reasons against co-sleeping

Opponents of co-sleeping with a child argue that immediately after giving birth a mother should teach her newborn to sleep on his own:

the healthy intimate life of parents is jeopardized by the presence of a baby in their bed;
an inexperienced mother, having fallen into deep sleep, risks crushing the child with her own body;
Excessive attachment to mother increases, which can cause psychological disorders in the future.

How to fall asleep with your baby correctly

The benefits of co-sleeping are a sensitive topic and subject to debate even among experienced physicians. If parents decide to sleep with their child, they need to take care of safety. In any case, the little man should have his own personal place where he can rest independently during the day.

If you plan to take your newborn to bed from the middle of the night, then the mother needs free access to the crib. It is advisable to think about having the child lie not in the middle between mom and dad, but on the edge. This means that the edge of the bed needs to be fenced off with something to prevent the baby from falling. This could be the back of a chair, a thick pillow, or a folded blanket. It’s easier to remove the side of the crib and move it to the parent’s bed.

For older children, they buy a one-and-a-half bed in which one of the adults falls asleep. There are some conditions for normal co-sleeping with a child that must be observed:

parents should not smoke (about the dangers of smoking during breastfeeding), drink alcohol or drugs;
You can’t take sleeping pills and sleep next to a fragile baby. If necessary, it is better to leave a small child to sleep on his own;
if one of the adults is sick, it is better to go to bed separately;
the baby must be healthy and full-term;
You cannot swaddle or wrap your baby to avoid overheating. It is better to wear light pajamas;
the temperature in the room should not be higher than 24 C, and the humidity should not be more than 70% - a detailed article about the optimal temperature for newborns;
If you plan to sleep with your child, you should not use antiperspirants, perfumes, or eau de toilette with a strong aroma. They can affect the baby's sleep by mixing with the mother's natural odor and interfere with the baby's normal breathing process;
Pets should not be allowed in the bed where the newborn sleeps;
a small child should not be placed together with older children who do not realize that he can be easily injured;
if parents are obese, it is worth thinking about the advisability of sleeping together;
The baby should not be left alone in the parent's bed. He must be supervised at all times.

Mommy must not forget about herself. Her position in bed should be comfortable for feeding and proper rest.

Optimal position: head on an elbow or pillow, mother lying half-sided, baby at the breast with his head slightly pushed back so that his nose does not rest on the chest.

After feeding, the baby is placed on his back, and the mother takes a comfortable position: either on her back or on her side. The main thing is that the width of the bed allows this to be done.

At what age should you start sleeping alone?

Notes to help you understand when to stop co-sleeping:

the child has already been weaned - see how to wean a child;
his night sleep lasts 5-6 hours without interruption - when the child begins to sleep all night;
During the day, the baby is less and less often in his mother’s arms;
if he wakes up at night, he doesn’t cry;
the child has an instinct of ownership, when there is a clear division into “this is mine, and this is yours”;
The child can be alone in the room for 15-20 minutes.

It is necessary to delay the transitional moment of growing up of a baby when:

the child suffered a birth injury;
he has high intracranial pressure;
there are signs of developmental delay and speech delay;
the baby is irritable, hyperactive, restless.

Such children most of all need their mother's presence. It is also not recommended to “evict” a child when teething, after an illness, or when attending kindergarten has just begun. These events are already exciting and caused stress. For a vulnerable psyche, such changes will be a real test.

Only the parents decide at what age the baby should be weaned from the habit of sleeping with his mother. Teaching a child to sleep independently is a difficult task, but it can be done. The main thing is patience and endurance of adults. It is worth considering that at first he will often wake up at night and run to the comfort of his parents’ bed. Gradually the baby will stop doing this.

Weaning your child off co-sleeping

Sleeping with a child must be stopped sooner or later. For a long time, mommy has already gotten used to sleeping in such company and it is difficult for her to experience this moment. Therefore, the readiness of both parties is important here. You will have to act confidently and not succumb to the whims and manipulations of the baby.

If the baby slept in his crib, pushed up to the parents’ sofa without a side, the weaning will be much calmer and faster. It is necessary to gradually move the crib further away from the parent’s room, until moving to your own room.
If the baby is to be moved to his own territory, the baby is given a crib and explained that this is his property, he can lie in it as he wants, only without his mother. Adults and big kids don't sleep together. This method works great for 2-3 year old children.
At first, you can turn on the night light so that the baby is not afraid to sleep on his own.
The process of going to bed should be turned into some kind of ritual: first, water procedures, brushing your teeth, changing into your favorite pajamas, a lullaby, then sleep. The child will quickly get used to this sequence, and the question of how to put him to sleep separately will no longer arise.
If a second child is planned, the older one should be trained to sleep in his own bed before the birth. Although sleeping with a child and pregnancy are compatible, you need to take into account that later it will be difficult to explain to the baby, who has a rival, why he was “kicked out”, and the other baby sleeps in his rightful favorite place.
You can time the event to coincide with a specific date.
If you have to buy a new bed for your child, you can take him with you and let him make a choice. It is usually easy to push children to make the right choice so that they think that it is their own decision. This will help the baby overcome internal fears and habits, and he will be happy to sleep in his own crib, chosen by him personally.